It was Sunday night
It was the night at the end of a ‘break’ of two days
It was the night before the next five in a row of work, school, church and other activities when:
“Lord God All-Powerful, I’ve always done my best to obey you. But …” 1 Kings 19:10
-the dishwasher was full of clean dishes, and the sinks were full of another load of dirty
-the son’s football gear was still in front of (not in) the washer
-the front door still framed in green painters tape … only one more coat of stain … only one more
-the meals still undecided for the week
-the dust not wiped away
-the mildew-lined bathtub still not scraped of old caulking and new applied
-the blog posts uncompleted
-at least one child was angry with me
-the mother-child conversations unspoken
-the time with hubby not happened
-the renewal, the playing, the rest, the quiet …
downcast eyes
downcast heart
tears building
regrets counted …
A Momma Meltdown was building.
And so, into the dark
into the night-lit light of candle, and torch, and stars peaking from edges of autumn night clouds
onto my beach by the shore
(okay, the brick patio by the pool)
I take my weary, worn out, waste of a woman self
… to weep my poor-me tears
In privacy.
And the frogs in the wooded area croaked their nighttime song
And the clouds lifted their curtain on their very own stars
And the raccoons, whose appearance was masked to me, tiptoed on the other side of the fence
And the air was warm like a familiar hug
And what had been melted dried up
And what had been undone was forgotten
And where there had been downcast eyes, a downcast heart …
were uplifted eyes and a peaceful heart.
‘things’ were still undone,
But I was not.
“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” Philippians 4:7
And just when I felt I had been put back together again, I read a message from a friend, that had come in when I went out …
a note encouraging me …
in the small things I do …
it was like …
a gentle breeze across my face.
“Go out and stand on the mountain,” the Lord replied. “I want you to see me when I pass by.” All at once, a strong wind shook the mountain and shattered the rocks. But the Lord was not in the wind. Next, there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. Then there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. Finally, there was a gentle breeze, and when Elijah Carole heard it, he she covered his her face with his her coat.” 1 Kings 19:11-13
itsawonderfilledlife 