September | 2024 | itsawonderfilledlife

Archive for September, 2024

First Love

Posted in WONDER, tagged Bible, christianity, GOD, Jesus, revelation on September 19, 2024| Leave a Comment »

Did you know that, in the US, Canada and some other nations, national First Love Day was just yesterday (September 18)? It is the day to celebrate the one who caused that first release of the love drug (said in Barry White deep voice) … oxytocin.

First love … just saying those two words may bring a face or name to mind immediately. The memories of the lovely, silly, warm feelings one felt, perhaps many, many years ago. The thought of a first love may also make one thankful that that person has stayed in the past.

In Revelation 2:4, the apostle John scolds the church in Ephesus:

“But I have this against you: You have abandoned your first love.”

He is telling that church (and maybe even tells the christian church today … and we individuals within it) that they/we have forgotten the love, the passion that was felt when we first came to know of who Jesus is and how much we are loved.

And why is this such a big deal? I love one of the points made in the Matthew Henry Commentary,

“These lively affections will abate and cool if great care be not taken, and diligence used, to preserve them in constant exercise.”

Isn’t that like all forms of love? If we do not dote on the one to whom we say we love … if we do not study and listen closely to what they say, if we do not take (make) time to be with this love … well, do we really love them? And, if we were to jump into the ‘others’ shoes, would we feel loved, would we know we are loved if the other does is not attentive, is not making efforts to show love towards us?

John then continues on with a stern (and serious) warning,

“Therefore, keep in mind how far you have fallen. Repent and perform the deeds you did at first. But if you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.” (v. 5)

Repent … just own how we have failed to love our God.

Perform the deeds we did at first … let the passion of the beginnings of love for God return.

BUT …
If we don’t do these things, something unbelievable, of upmost seriousness, is our consequence (as the church and as we who claim the name of Christ …

“I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place”

For the lampstand to be removed is to have the Light of Christ removed. This is so very serious.

Oh, how we need to call back our first love joy. How we need to return to that passion we once had for this one who brings light to our life.

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What I Learned from Michelangelo

Posted in WONDER, tagged #italy, art, art-history, Michelangelo, travel on September 15, 2024| 1 Comment »

One of the beauties of working in a Christian high school is that we start the day with devotions. Each teacher does this differently, which is an unpredictable benefit, as well, as each teacher brings faith into the classroom from their vantage point.

Last week, in an art class, the teacher began his devotions speaking of the art and poetry, of Michelangelo. Until then, I was unaware that this well known artist’s ‘other’ talent and was quite captivated by the following poem.

On the Brink of Death
Now hath my life across a stormy sea
Like a frail bark reached that wide port where all
Are bidden, ere the final reckoning fall
Of good and evil for eternity.
Now know I well how that fond phantasy
Which made my soul the worshipper and thrall
Of earthly art, is vain; how criminal
Is that which all men seek unwillingly.
Those amorous thoughts which were so lightly dressed,
What are they when the double death is nigh?
The one I know for sure, the other dread.
Painting nor sculpture now can lull to rest
My soul that turns to His great love on high,
Whose arms to clasp us on the cross were spread.

Written in the later years of his life, On the Brink of Death, speaks to Michelangelo's awareness of his coming end, reprioritizing of what makes up his life and what is to come.

The lines that grabbed me were, 

"painting nor sculpture 
now can lull to rest 
my soul  ..."

Ahhh! That which, in this life calms (or lulls to rest) my soul ...

I think his words settled on my heart because, 

At the end of each summer school/work break ... 

a break from 'people' work ... 
a break when I immerse myself in 'hand' work ...

as I put away my paint brushes, my hammers, my power tools and caulking guns ...

I always sigh to myself, knowing that my hands-on creative season is over. I have to comfort myself with the belief that is was enough to carry me through the months ahead. 

But, I can also know and say (as that famous creative),

(my soul) "turns to His great love on high"

And in Him, in his love, my creative soul can find rest and purpose.

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to the not so perfect mom

Posted in WONDER on September 2, 2024| 1 Comment »

“I’m going to do it all different, better.”

That was my wordless declaration as an adolescent girl, rose-colored glasses perched precariously on my button nose.

The idealism of youth can be a powerful motivator, a fire-in-the-belly, a pedestal of goals to stand upon (and fall down from).

And yet, that was me. My first-born determination … the embodiment of ‘the iron that had entered my soul’. I was going to do it all different, better than my parents, my mother.

In recent years I have come to understand that my rose-colored glasses, first-born determination and good intentions amounted to …

so many more failures than I’d counted on.

The unexpected, undesirable results have had me wondering what I missed in my perfectly planned goals. They have also caused me to take another look at the parental case study of my early years, my own parents.

And this reflection has had me hanging my (arrogant, critical) head in shame …

for now I am starting to get it,

for it is not all about me … me goals … my plans … my formula.

We, as mums (since, I am a mum), set out to do and achieve our goals … not a bad place to start, but we cannot influence every result, we are not the only ones who impact our households. We also mess up, in all of our humanness. Then there is that blessed curse of freewill (I hope God is ready for a tête-à-tête when I arrive in heaven)!

Awhile back, in the midst of an intense conversation with one of my kids, I expressed something like, “I cannot believe you would think that was the right decision on that subject.”

To which they responded, “how am I supposed to know what is the right decision, this is the first time I have been this age, in this situation.”

BOOM!

mic drop

Good intentions aside, aren’t we all living this life for the first time? There are no professionals in this thing we call life. And, life does not have a formula to follow for guaranteed results (save such lofty hopes for products promising to defy the effects of aging). We do our best (the only thing we can do) and then … life happens.

It all brings me back to my adolescent declaration that “I will do it all differently, better.”

I can now see how well my parents did, with what they knew, what they had at their disposal. They did their level best. Could it have been better? Of course. But, they were limited by the same realities that I am. They were doing their best, because they were living their situations, their lives, for the first time.

Now, I watch my mum navigating the changes and challenges of her life in the past few years. As she has walked through grief and loneliness. As I have observed her learning new things, making tough choices, making decisions on her own, embarking on independence later in life. You see, this is the first time she has been in this place, this time.

And my rose-colored glasses have been lifted off my face.

And I see now, with a clarity I was blind to in my youth.

And something new replaces a formula for guaranteed results.

It’s grace, understanding that this is her first go-around too.

I am learning to give grace to her, as a practise of the Golden Rule … to treat her in a manner I would hope to be treated.

I am so proud of you mum … thanks for modelling that you can pivot, change in the winter of life … your first time being this age.

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