itsawonderfilledlife

I just realized that I had not written a post for today, so today’s post is a repost from 2012. As I re-read this one, I agree with ii’s words still …

Last weekend someone asked me “why do you blog?” It was such an easy question to answer, because the one reason I blog is complete and utter selfishness, I blog for me.

After about ten months of writing everything from the insane to the serious, averaging about five posts a week, writing has become something that I rely on, that I need to do, that helps me to keep in balance.

Although there is great jesting in my house about my desire for Oprah to discover me, really, I write for me. This little corner of the cyber world is where I connect with God, where I process my hurts, where I share my celebrations, and where I just get it all out. For me, itsawonderfilledlife is my hairdresser, my bartender, my shrink. And, you who read are the flies on the wall.

Writing has allowed me to have a voice, my voice. In this venue I am still daughter, and mother, and wife, and friend, and pastor’s wife and special ed. assistant, but I am mostly just me. I am just a woman, speeding down the superhighway of aging, who loves her God, her kids and her hubby, trying to make ends meet, experiencing great successes, and dark failures. And this is the forum that I have used to help myself find reason for it all.

When I chose itsawonderfilledlife as my blog title, I did so with pshychology in my mind. I am one who looks for a reason for every event that occurs. I look for wonder, like others might look for chocolate (okay, I look for that on a daily basis too), or luck, or a break. For me, when I can see wonder in my day, I can see purpose for living. For me, a little bit of wonder can make my experiences of living purpose-filled, and in focusing on wonder, I do not spiral down into the dank world of negative thinking.

Recently I was feeling a bit bummed that my stats were lower for a particular week. I pondered different ways that I could bolster them, but that takes time. Then I re-read a couple from that week, and felt good with what I had written, and felt good as I remembered the pleasure that writing them provided. It was then that I remembered, I am doing this for me. So, I forgot about feeling bummed, and felt the pleasure of communing with my God, my thoughts and the computer keyboard. That is why I write this blog, and it’s good enough reason for me 😉 .