itsawonderfilledlife

Archive for 2020

Just Love

Posted in Walking with God, WONDER, tagged #abideinhim, #godislove, #justlove on August 6, 2020| Leave a Comment »

Just love.

I knew the response as clearly and confidently as if I had heard with words spoken, verbally … but they weren’t.

I have been praying over a specific person and situation for quite awhile now. Each time I bring this one to the creator of all, I ask, what do you want me to do? to say? Each time, I hear, not with my ears, but my heart,

just love

It doesn’t feel like it is enough, most days. It doesn’t even feel like I am doing anything. How can I claim this one, this situation, for God, if my words never speak his name, never direct to him?

Yet …

God is love.

That’s what his word tells us (1 John 4:16). His existence is the definition of love.

That passage doesn’t just stop there.

“God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”

So, as I abide … as I stick to love, living and dwelling in love, I am dwelling or living with God …

and his love dwells in me …

His message, the Gospel, or Good News message of salvation and redemption … it is told when I love others. In doing so I am sharing his Good News.

just love … there is no more important thing to do.

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Holding My Breath

Posted in Aging, WONDER, tagged #carpediem, #holdingmybreath, #seasonschange on August 4, 2020| 2 Comments »

The sun shone, blue skies for miles, light breeze in the air … a smile crept across my face … contentment … not just contentment, for there was something else in the air.

Every year I feel it creep into my being. In the midst of the dog days of summer, in the midst of the season of rest and recreation, in the midst of everyday life slowing down, like a comma in a sentence …

the calendar turns to August
and I hold my breath

Like the grim reaper holding a sign declaring that “the end is nigh” the calendar reminds me that summer’s end is just around the corner.

Rest and frivolity, summer’s sun and warmth, watching the flowers grow and change each day, sunsets of bended and scattered light, coffee dates filled with laughter and evenings without a care for the morning alarm. These will largely come to their seasonal end, replaced with work and schedules and structure.

In recent years this turn of calendar page reminds me of change of season in broader sense. It reminds me that my life, in it’s natural ebb and flow, is migrating from summer to autumn. Perhaps, if I were honest with myself, I would acknowledge that it has already moved into that third season. That there is but one season left … not yet there, but I can see it …

and I hold my breath

But, for today I will stop and smell those summer roses, declaring boldly carpe diem, as I seize this day … after all, YOLO (you only live once).

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Perception vs Reality

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged #cantknowothersjourneys, #dontjudge, #limitedscope, #perceptionvsreality, #wecantseethewholepicture, limitedperspective on August 2, 2020| Leave a Comment »

Years ago I read a story that has stayed with me ever since, re-surfacing whenever my subconscious decides that I need to be reminded of what it has to teach me … again.

It is the story of a man with two children on a train. On the voyage, the man sat in his seat, staring out the window, stone silent. His children, of primary school ages, were loud, disruptive to all around. Many people whispering, pointing, throwing stares and attitude. They were disgusted with the irresponsibility of this father. One woman, in particular, was quite put out by this man’s lack of care for his children and the effect their bad behavior was having on all around. She was heard by all (seemingly except for the father) making statements of disgust.

When the train reached it’s destination, all disembarked.

The woman, who had been particularly bothered by the children’s behaviors and the father’s lack of response to them, was greeted by her sister. Her sister was standing beside an older couple, who excused themselves when they saw who they were picking up.

The sister explained they were picking up their son-in-law and his two children. Their daughter had recently died and they were taking in the children for a time, while their father, distraught over his wife’s death, was struggling to care for them.

We do not always see the reality of circumstances from the place we are currently standing.

I have certainly been that woman, bothered by what I perceived to be lack of responsibility or bad behavior. I have rolled my eyes, made judgements, shook my head, made comments to others. In short, I have responded under the guidance of what I perceive.

But, I have also been distraught, heartbroken, felt that the ground beneath me has given away. In those times, no matter the mask I might have placed over my face, I have probably been irresponsible, ill behaved.

This is a lesson that I am thankful resurfaces in my mind, for it reminds me of my limited perspective, my inability to see the whole picture, my lack of scope.

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Beauty Everywhere

Posted in life, Walking with God, WONDER, tagged #beauty, #beautyeverywhere on July 30, 2020| 2 Comments »

I have come to be a believer in the words of the most influential artistic voices in Britain during the Victorian period, William Morris :

“Have nothing
in your house
that you do not know
to be useful,
or believe
to be beautiful.”

With each passing year, the more I desire, no … need the presence of beautiful things things around me. Beauty reduces my stress, puts a smile on my face, reminds me that there is good in the world, inspires my creativity and whispers to me “I was thinking of you when I dreamed up these lilies.”

Just a couple of weeks ago I decided to cut a few lilies from my small garden, to place in a vase in my house. Before they even began to open their scent filled the room. Each day has been exciting to watch them slowly go from no hint of the color to full and opened beauty.

“Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin.
Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor
was dressed like one of these.” Luke 12:27

As I embrace my inner lover of beauty I find that there is more out there. The sunrise, or sunset. The seasonal rotations of plant and flower growth. The scent of those vintage roses. The reflection on a pond or lake. Birds singing out the dawn chorus. The coastal and sky horizon. The grandeur of the mountains. The sound of waves crashing on the beach. Fresh snow falling (you knew it was coming).

The more beauty we see … the more beauty we see.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

whatever is lovely …

It’s an awaking of awareness of beauty. In a sense it is a change of thinking.

” … as a person thinks, so is he”

We are encouraged in Philippians that we are to direct our thoughts, our focus on the ‘good’ things … what is true, noble, pure, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy … lovely.

The practises of living prescribed in the Bible are ones that are truly best practise for us as God’s creation. In this scripture we are encouraged to focus on the true, the positives, the good, the lovely …

if we are practise life in this way, perhaps we will experience less stress, anxiety, weariness, sorrow and hatred.

“The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes. If you foolishly ignore beauty, you will soon find yourself without it. Your life will be impoverished. But if you invest in beauty, it will remain with you all the days of your life.” Frank Lloyd Wright

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The Light that is In You

Posted in life, Love, WONDER, tagged #covid19, #deepgladnessanddeephungermeet, #lightshinesinthedark, #thelightthatisinyou, #whatawonderfulworld on July 28, 2020| 3 Comments »

It can seem that our world is a dire place, with so many evil acts, selfishness and hatred. It can seem hopeless … we can feel hopeless.

For Christ-followers, hope is the gift that we have accepted, that we are purposed to share, in acts and attitudes of love.

1967 might have felt similarly hopeless. It was during the time of the Vietnam War, Civil Rights Movement, Detroit riots, China tested it’s first hydrogen bomb, the Six-Day war (between Israel and neighboring Arab countries).

It was at this time that song writers Bob Thiele and George David Weiss wrote a song, that would be sung by Louis Armstrong … What a Wonderful World … in the midst of such a hopeless time in history.

Thiele stated, “We wanted this immortal musician and performer to say, as only he could, the world really is great: full of the love and sharing (that) people make possible for themselves and each other every day.”

Though this song was not written or sung as a song of praise, or from a Christian perspective, I find myself thinking of the words of writer and theologian, Fredrick Buechner:

“The place where God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”

As a Christ-follower, I have been called to my family, my community around me physically, as well as this virtual one. My deep gladness is simple, it comes from the gift of love that God has offered and I have accepted … this is where I meet ‘my world’, who is hungry, ravenous for the life-giving hope of the love of Christ.

But I cannot meet my world’s hunger, I cannot offer nourishment from a place of hopelessness, from a place of fear. I need to first be fed the good fruits, be encouraged in hope which will allow the love to grow … hopefully spilling over to the world around me.

Garbage in = garbage out

Good people, we do life in the midst of such sorrow, for so many reasons these days … but we cannot allow it to dim the light that is in us.

“Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” MLK Jr.

LR Knost, author, feminist, social justice activist, said:

“Do not be dismayed by the brokenness of the world. All things break. And all things can be mended. Not with time, as they say, but with intention. So go. Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you.”

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Celebrating the Memories

Posted in FAMILY, life, Marriage, WONDER, tagged #anniversary, #celebratingthememories, #firstanniversaryalone, #lifetogether, #marriageinthelonghaul on July 26, 2020| 2 Comments »

Forty-nine years ago my parents spoke their vows, exchanged rings and sealed them with a kiss. This happened after a short engagement, in an old stone church, surrounded by family and friends.

Forty-nine years of for better … or worse, richer … or poorer, health … or sickness. Forty-nine years of love, and arguments, and silence, and disagreements, and children, and inlaws, and bills, and holidays and memories … so many memories.

They married, but their marriage did not begin as two, for my two-year old self was there to keep them from focusing too much attention on the other. Fifteen months later their son followed and twenty-six months another son.

There were numerous dogs and cats and even a few fish (but NEVER anything from the rodent family … NEVER).

In forty-nine years there were only two homes, one built by my dad’s father, the other a new home in a neighborhood with other young families. One phone number … just one.

They raised us kids, just like they were raised. Fed us what they had been fed. Spoke words, rules and wisdom that they had been given. Disciplined us as they had been disciplined.

In their house there was always yarn, cheese and the daily newspaper. Hockey ruled the TV most evenings and closed eyes were no indication that it was okay to change the channel.

The vegetables were peas, beans or corn (or all three at once). Most meals were made in quantities that would last much of the week and appeared in casserole dishes.

Physical ailments could be fixed with Vicks Vapo Rub, Absorbine Jr. or Polysporin. Home improvements could be fixed with a nail, tape (copious amounts of tape) or wallpaper.

Christmas morning always started before the sun even imagined rising and has always included a green tree. Birthdays were never without a cake, candles, ice cream and a call to serenade the birthday girl or boy (woman or man) with Happy Birthday singing. Spring was not spring without pussy willows. Hot summer days were for potato salad (with peas). Hot summer nights would hold the possibility of a drive to Sussex or the village for ice cream. Soap operas were enjoyed by both partners (though one wasn’t as quick to admit this truth).

One spent too much money when out, the other spent too much time away at the ball field (for better or worse … so the vows say and is the reality of marriage between humans).

In recent years summer evenings were spent on the swing, looking back, looking forward.

But there are other memories. Ones a daughter or son do not remember. Ones of just the two, in their wandering through married life together. They are the spectacular memories of words said and life lived that only one other person on the planet shares. These memories of joys and even heartbreaks bring wordless smiles and tears.

Memories of a long marriage are sure to awaken us all to the brevity of life.

It is in looking back that the preceding years seem to have gone in a flash. These memories of marriage are what we hold on to. They are the gift and the offering wrapped up together … the offering in their original experience and a gift when looking back at life and love shared.

The Bible says that marriage is a mystery. Maybe the memories of a long marriage are the unravelling of the mystery, slowly reminding us how fortunate we are to have these mental souvenirs of the past.

And, even though health may fail, though life here may have an end, the memories live on in our minds, in our hearts and even in the generations that are woven into the marriage story.

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Savour Today

Posted in FAMILY, The Kids, WONDER, tagged #lookingback, #savourtoday, #thebestdayistoday, #theygrowsofast, #timeflies, #usetimewisely on July 23, 2020| Leave a Comment »

I have hit that stage, as a woman, that hubby and I used to refer to as PMW … the post menopausal woman … children have grown to adulthood, no grandchildren, but there is a twinkle in her eye when she sees a little one.

Don’t worry … I am not quite at the yearning for grandkids stage, but I am more aware of the reality of the saying

the days are long
but the years are short.

Lately there seem to be littles at every turn. Friends with newborns, children who stop to chat when I am outside, the cutie who comes to our church food bank, whose smile melts my heart.

With each turn I hear the words, the voices of women my current age (the PMWs),

“time goes so fast”
“just savour every minute”
“don’t rush them to grow up”
“you’ll miss this stage when they grow up”

The thing is, I was never a baby-person. Oh, I loved my littles with my whole, entire momma heart, but I had babies so as to get teenagers. So, when they were (finally) teens, making me the happiest momma around, I just didn’t relate when the PMWs would say,

“don’t you wish they were still little?”

and I would smile and say, “nope.”

Yesterday I was emptying a cabinet and rediscovered the framed images from my kids childhood. My heart ached a bit as I looked at their little faces, remembering small hands in mine, busy and demanding days, sweet bedtime snuggles, stories and prayers.

But my ache, the source of the lump in my throat … it wasn’t because I long to go back in time to their childhood, but because I hoped that I had savoured the moments I was in, the moments of their years as littles.

Then, as if the young, exhausted, pulled-in-every-direction momma I was back then, was standing behind me, whispering in my ear, I heard her youthful wisdom say,

“time still goes so fast”
“savour every moment with them as adults”
“don’t rush them to the next stage of adulthood”
“you may, one day, miss this stage they are in now”

And so, I am going to take the wisdom of younger me … not long for the future, not yearn for the past, but just enjoy the gift of today. I may not see or speak to them daily, but I can take every opportunity to listen actively, to encourage them, to take every chance to speak words and actions of love to their hearts. I can pound on the doors of heaven for them each day.

For, these days too can be long, but the years are also short.

“Look carefully then how you walk,
not as unwise but as wise,
making the best use of the time …”
Ephesians 5:15-16

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Following the Voice

Posted in Walking with God, WONDER, tagged #thesheepknowhisvoiceandfollow, #thosewhoknowandcareforus on July 21, 2020| Leave a Comment »

This summer the Wonderdog has been teaching me something …

we listen to and follow
those who know and care for us

It has been four months since work turned toward home, giving me ample time to spend my days with my fur friend. He is constantly with me, following me from the bed, in the morning, to the kitchen, the office, the family room or the bathroom. When out and I return home, opening the door from the garage, there he is, tucked into the back of the sofa, eyes transfixed to the door, ready to leap towards me as if I were coming home …

just. for. him.

He reminds me of that song we sing at Christmas time, about father Christmas …

“He sees you when you’re sleeping
He knows when you’re awake”

Now he also stays close to my husband, sleeping under the desk, at his feet.

But … I am the one who most often feeds him, takes him out to the grass, gives him medicine, fills his Kong with treats, invites him for a walk, or orders him a puppucinno in the drive through. I am the one who invites him onto the bed for a nighttime cuddle, who taught him to love (or simply to endure) snuggles, who put drops in his ear and eye last winter. I am the one who takes him to sit outside … where he is so very tempted to bark at every passerby.

I care for him.

the good. the bad. the ugly.

And he knows it because …

we listen to and follow
those who know and care for us

As I was writing on my patio the other day, I realized that my foot was warm with his soft head resting there. Then I remembered that each day we had been outside lately, this is where his head would be … could he get closer to me?

He feels protected, secure in my attention to his needs. Even in my discipline and ear drops (his least favorite thing) he knows he is cared for. I know this because …

we listen to and follow
those who know and care for us

“My sheep hear My voice,
and I know them,
and they follow Me.”
John 10:27

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The Sabbath was Made for Humankind

Posted in Faith, Walking with God, WONDER, tagged #nobenediction, #sabbath, #sabbathrest, #sabbathsummer on July 19, 2020| 2 Comments »

The practises of Sabbath have been different during these months of working collectively to help hinder the spread of the Coronavirus.

No more do we head to our local meeting places of faith families, where we gather together to worship in prayer, song, reading the Word of God, giving of our tithes and being encouraged in our faith through all of those shared practises as well as through the sharing of a message that encourages us to hold close our relationship with the God of creation.

My Sabbath today has had a fine start.

Sundays are a backwards day for hubby and I, as I oddly sleep later than he, who rises to prepare for a full day of work. This is my solitary day … a day I am completely aware of and immersed in the presence of God in every area of my life.

My call to worship began when I awoke to staring from my bedside, the Wonderdog eager for an invitation onto the bed for snuggles.

After a leisurely awakening, the morning ablutions for my fur friend and I, I was off on my weekly trip to a small grocery store, just after it opens … still quiet, barely a shopper to be seen.

I listened to songs of faith.

Enjoyed a hot steaming cup of coffee while wrapping a gift for a new delivered one, unable to contain whispered prayers of thanks.

Listened to a podcast about the Christian faith that stimulated curiosity to go into the word.

Poured myself a cold glass of cranberry juice, spread fresh strawberry jam with a hint of lemon, on a scone (not a typical breakfast, but … the Sabbath should be a sweet day).

Filled the Wonderdog’s treat toy with his favorite mixture, then out to our small patio.

A gentle breeze brought scents from my hydrangea plants (once blue, that are now pink), and other floral perfumes from the neighborhood.

Though this patio, this property does not provide the peaceful quiet of our previous acreage, peace lives here, in the contentment of the provision, in the peace that passes my human comprehension.

I sit in my chair, sip from my glass, breath in the scents, smile at my sleeping Wonderdog, hear the sound of texts arriving from my sweetest loves.

I pray, words of thanks, or appeal for the needs of others, I seek wisdom and comfort from the scriptures.

No benediction … the Sabbath goes on.

“Then he (Jesus) said to them,
“The Sabbath was made for humankind,
not humankind for the Sabbath.”
Mark 2:27

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Rabbit Holes are Everywhere

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged #diversions, #rabbitholes, #rabbitholesareeverywhere on July 16, 2020| 5 Comments »

Good intentions and a slight excitement coursing through my mind … something I did not have in my grasp in a long time.

I was going to head upstairs, sit at my computer and dedicate one hour … just one hour to editing the book I finished writing last fall.

Then I decided to first make a coffee.

Then the machine showed the message that it was time to descale.

I followed through with that process … that thirty minute process.

Then I thought I would cook the potatoes for potato salad.

Then I emptied the kitchen food waste container.

Then I finished taking the hardware off a wooden box I wanted to paint.

Then I went up to my office … to get a paintbrush to paint the wooden box.

The next thing I knew it was three and a half hours later, I still had to make the potato salad, call my mom, take the things on the kitchen counter to put away in the garage …

Rabbit holes … places where the time for my well intended plans go …

Writing, editing of my book was left at the base of the tree, while I slid down into one rabbit hole after another, until the time available for editing my book was gone.

As the time to write past I heard myself echoing the words of Paul, the author of the book of Romans (7:15)

“I just don’t understand myself. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I don’t want to do.”

Of course the rabbit hole that Paul was talking about was the rabbit hole that is sin. Nonetheless, I get what he is saying. And, well … sometimes I just think that it is some dark pitchfork-wielding character in my mind that keeps me from completing what I so want to accomplish.

Paul goes on to say, (19-20):

“For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.”

That final comment resonates in my mind. For I do often feel as though I move from task to task as though on autopilot, moved by an invisible force.

Though there are many things in our lives that we have choice over, things that are not inherently good or bad, focusing on what we are called to do, being purposeful in our efforts to accomplish tasks that we are called to … that bring us life, takes effort. It often means having to put blinders on and moving forward.

Ah, perhaps today will be one that I will be able to the good I want.

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