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Through it All

Posted in GOD, WONDER, tagged #horatiospafford, #itiswell, #kristenedimarco, #throughitall, blindeyedfaith, Faith, Trust on May 24, 2016| 6 Comments »

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What is it that can cause a man who has lost almost every earthly blessing to pen it is well?

My most favourite hymn of all time is the haunting story of the blind-eyed faith of Horatio Spafford’s It is Well.

No doubt the story of Spafford writing it, when crossing the Atlantic, at the place where his four daughters drowned (after previously losing his young son to death, and experiencing his financial ruin in the great Chicago Fire) only enhances the significance of it’s meaning.

When I am faced with life-shaking struggles, or mountain-high obstacles that seem impossibly unmovable, or when I just cannot seem to see what is around the next corner, I am confronted with the question,

can I still sing, it is well with?

And I do sing it, sometimes with expectant joy, more often through clenched teeth, robotic.

God does not ask for me (us) to be a mannequin-like worshipper, he wants my (our) gritty heart-broken soul. He wants me (us) to understand what faith is, “the confidence of what we hope for, the assurance of what we do not see” (Hebrews 1:1).

Following this definition of faith are reminders of the those who have lived with blind-eyed faith (Noah, Abraham, Moses, Rahab etc.). The chapter ends with these words:

“These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.” (Hebrews 1:39-40)

If we can have the confidence in our God, that he sees and knows what we do not. If we can hold to his promises, that he has something planned that we might not even live to see. If we can trust in his love for us, then it is well, with our souls.

Though the song below is not Spafford’s version, it holds that same blind-eyed assurance of his faithfulness to us.

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Things That Cannot Be Duplicated

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #acts17, #creatorgod, #thearts, #thingsthatcannotbeduplicated, Creation on June 10, 2015| 1 Comment »

I love the arts. I love music, I love drama, I love literature, I love films, I love dance. I love all of the cultural disciplines that are included in ‘the arts.’

The arts are a means of expression, a means of sharing, a means of communication. They can move us to laughter, or tears. They can help us understand what our life experiences do not provide exposure to. They can help us to live vicariously through other characters, or creatures, or simply the created.

I love to go to Bard on the Beach productions (Bard on the Beach) in the Vancouver area (even though, I admit, I normally do not enjoy Shakespeare). There is nothing like beautiful architecture to delight my imagination. I love to watch an individual dance across a dance floor, like I would never have the gracefulness to do. I so enjoy reading a book, or poem, or verse that makes me stop, and just enjoy the words on the page. It is a joy to watch amateur or professional actors play parts, as though they are those very characters. I can be moved to tears by a song played by a musician with a giftedness that comes from more than just endless hours of practice.

One thing I am becoming aware of, though, is that not everything can be duplicated by the arts. There are some things that, no matter how hard we creative humans might try, we cannot duplicate the ‘real thing.’

Within nature there are things that, in my humble opinion, painters, artists, musicians or even photographers cannot match reality. Things like an eagle in flight, a rainbow, the sound of rain falling at night, or the sounds of an eagle, or an owl, or chickadees, or a band of coyotes (I never want to meet up with them on a walk, but there is something so hauntingly beautiful about their yipping and yelping).

In human life there are communications and responses that plays and films fall short of duplicating perfectly. Things like a parent looking into the face of their newborn baby, or the look between a couple who are in love, or a first kiss, or (something horror movies cannot reproduce at all) a persons responses to a trauma.

We cannot live vicariously through the arts. We need to live, really live in order to really experience our own life experiences.

We also need to recognize, and credit the originator of all of the arts of man, and that it is only through His incomparable creation that we have a model, a muse, through which to create, perform and express our gifts through the arts.

“The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’ As some of your own poets have said, ‘We are his offspring.’ Acts 17:24-28

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Are you Brave?

Posted in GOD, life, The Hubby, WONDER, tagged #areyoubrave, #fearandanxiety, #isaiah42:16, #monstersunderthebed, Alone, Fear., Plato, yoda on May 18, 2015| 2 Comments »

When I was a child, I thought that to be brave was to go in my room and night, and actually look under my bed to see if there were monsters there.

When I was a teen, I thought that to be brave was walking home alone, in the quiet dark, after a night of babysitting.

When I was a young adult, I thought that to be brave was to stay home alone when my hubby went out of town.

Brave has many faces, but on each face a fear of something, known or unknown, is written. The fears of childhood are the foundation for the fears of the rest of our lives. If I re-read my own expressions of what it was to be brave when I was younger, they are all centered on two fears; fear of the dark, and fear of being alone.

I believe that they are universal fears, I believe they are innate fears. I believe the
two fears are really one fear, for to be afraid of the dark is always diminished by
being in the presence of another.

From when we are born, we experience times alone. From our earliest beginnings in our mother’s womb, we experience dark. Yet those two fears go with us, and in some, intensify as we get older.

There is something about nighttime that can cause doubts, discomfort and fears to arise more easily. Add to that being alone, and the night can seem endless and hopeless.

For a child, being taken to bed, being tucked in, being reassured by a loving person that they are safe and that the nighttime will not last forever, can lessen their fear of the dark. If that does not work, having someone to accompany them in the dark, until they fall off to sleep will eliminate any further cries of fear.

For myself, as an adult, I hear far fewer noises, I sleep far easier, when hubby is in the house with me. His presence assures me that I am not alone, and the dark no longer has power over me.

If we are to be brave, we need to understand that the presence of another can be the light that takes away our fear of the dark, because their presence itself is like a light.

God’s message to us all in Isaiah 42:16 is “I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.” Whenever we think that we are alone, we need to remember that the One who never breaks His promises to us, is with us. Him in our lives means we are never fully alone, and the darkness is eliminated by the light of his presence.

Plato said, “we can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” The light of the world has come to illuminate our steps, he is like that parent by the bed of a fearful child, the friend walking you home in the dark, the person on the other side of the bed (snoring like a band saw), but He never leaves those who choose to brave and trust the presence of his light.

“Fear is the path to the dark side.”
Yoda

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People Pleasers

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #peoplepleasers, #pleasingothers, #splitpersonality, Purpose on August 27, 2014| 4 Comments »

I sat there looking at the four types/styles of leaders on the paper, and wondered which I might be, but with each passing moment I was more and more confused. It seemed to me that I was about half of one, and half another.

For whatever reason, it really irritated me that I could not definitively figure out which type or style I was. I was looking for black and white within a mind consumed with grey.

Finally it came to me, the following day, while I was still obsessing about my split personality. My split personality is due to being a people pleaser.

As anyone else who shares this innate need to please other people can attest to, we do all that we can to make other people notice and be happy with us and our efforts. We will even do and be who we are not, in order to attain the affirmation and positive attention of others. After years of ‘becoming’ what and who we may not be, we can end up struggling to see who we really are … who God created us to be.

Now don’t go thinking I am depicting myself (or other people pleasers) as martyrs or victims of the expectations of others. For most who seek to please others, they do it because that is what they have been taught, or it is something that feeds them. For some it is even a means of control and power, providing opportunity to manipulate or create a positive image of themselves.

Whatever the case, our gifts and our abilities can be modified by the behavior of becoming something … someone else.

This is seen so often in volunteer organizations. A need is expressed, and someone jumps to meet the need, not because it is within their unique talents (or even interest) but because they do not wish to disappoint or see the need unmet. Often this results in not having the best person doing the job. It can also result in the one doing the job being too busy to fulfill a task that they are best suited for, because they (we) are too busy filling positions to make others happy.

As I looked at the leadership qualities for each of types of leader I read, “good with paperwork” on one and “not good with paperwork” on another.
Would I choose to do paperwork?
NO.
Could I do paperwork?
Yes.
Would I choose to do paperwork if it pleased someone?
Yes.
Should I choose to do paperwork BECAUSE it pleases someone?
NO!

This could put us on a mission, to find out who we really are, not for the sake of pleasing others, but for the sake of pleasing the God who has given us a purpose and a future.

“Whatever you do, do your work heartily,
as for the Lord
rather than men.”
Colossians 3:23

“For I know the plans I have for you,”
declares the Lord.
“plans to prosper you
and not to harm you,
plans to give you a hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11

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Take a Break

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #devilsconvention, #preoccupied, #stufftodo, #takeabreak, Busy, Church, GOD, Rest on August 24, 2014| 4 Comments »

My post today is not one that I wrote, and I do not even know who wrote it, so I cannot give them the credit. What I do know is that I recently heard it, just when I needed the reminder of the message within. So, today, with back to school approaching, I am sharing this post with you, praying that you receive it just when and where you need it.

THE DEVIL’S CONVENTION
Are You Too Busy For Christ?
Keep The Christians Busy
Satan called a worldwide convention.
In his opening address to his assembled demons he said:
“We cannot keep the Christians from going to church. We cannot keep them from reading their Bibles and knowing the truth. We cannot even keep them from conservative values.

Nevertheless, we can do something else. We can keep them from forming an intimate, abiding relationship with Christ. If they gain that connection with Jesus, our power over them is broken.

So, let them go to church, let them have their conservative lifestyle, but steal their time, so they cannot gain that relationship.
This is what I want you to do. Distract them from gaining hold of their Savior and maintaining that vital connection!”
“How shall we do this?” shouted the demons.
“Keep them busy with the non-essentials of life. Invent schemes to occupy their time.” he answered. “Tempt them to spend, spend, spend, then borrow, borrow, borrow. Convince the wives to go to work for long hours and the husbands to work 6 or 7 days a week, 10 – 12 hours a day, so they can afford their lifestyles. Keep them from spending time with
their children. As their family fragments, soon their homes will offer no escape from the pressures of work.

Also:
*Super-stimulate their minds so that they cannot hear that still small voice.
*Entice them to play the radio or cassette player whenever they drive, and to keep the TV, VCR, CD players and PCs
going constantly in their homes.
*See to it that every store and restaurant in the world blares secular music constantly. This will jam their minds and break
that union with Christ.
*Fill their coffee tables with secular magazines and newspapers.
*Pound their minds with the news 24 hours a day.
*Invade their driving moments with billboards.
*Flood their mailboxes with junk mail, sweepstakes, mail order catalogs, and every kind of newsletter and promotional
offering, free products, services, and false hopes.
*In their recreation, let them be excessive. Have them return from their recreation exhausted, disquieted, and
unprepared for the coming week.
*Do not let them go out in nature to reflect on God’ s wonders. Send them to amusement parks, sporting events,
concerts, and movies instead.
*When they meet for spiritual fellowship, involve them in gossip and small talk so that they leave with troubled
consciences and unsettled emotion.
*Let them be involved in soul-winning, but crowd their lives with so many good causes they have no time to seek power
from Christ in prayer.

Soon they will be working in their own strength, sacrificing their health and family for the good of the cause.”
Convention Aftermath
It was quite a convention. The demons went eagerly to their assignments causing Christians everywhere to get busy, busy, busy and rush here and there.
Has the devil been successful at his scheme? You be the judge.
How about this definition of BUSY: Being Under Satan’s Yoke.
Author Unknown

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Certain Uncertainty

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #certainuncertainty, #inchristalone, #uncertainty, Control, Planning, Redemption, Surprises on August 19, 2014| Leave a Comment »

I love to know what is next … how the movie or book ends, what is planned for tomorrow, where our next vacation will be, what renovation we will do next on our home. I am into certainty. I plan our meals for a couple of weeks in advance, I countdown to holidays, I scour home stores for ideas to duplicate in our home (I rarely have any time to actually do them), and I sometimes read the last page of the novel before starting it (although I always find it is pointless, because it never seems to tell me anything anyway).

Life, though, is not full of certainty, but uncertainty.

There are hiccups to plans, there are changes in schedules, there are twists in the road, and there are surprises around every corner. The only thing I am truly certain of is that nothing in life is for certain.

I learned this a few years back, on our anniversary. As the days grew closer, our daughters were talking up ‘the gift’ hubby had gotten for me. There is nothing worse for adding pressure, than your kids excitedly telling you that you will love what their dad got for you! I mean, this meant that how I responded could disappoint not only hubby, but our kids too.

I knew that I had to plan my response. And so I went into constant rehearsals … in the van, in my backyard, in the kitchen, in the mirror … everywhere I went for a week I was practicing my response. By our anniversary I was a well-oiled machine (with a rumbly in my tumbly, from the anxiety).

When ‘it’ arrived at the house, I was sequestered to our daughters room, until ‘it’ and our family were all in place. Then I was beckoned to the living room, where they were all excitedly awaiting (and I was hoping I would faint before I got there, and had to act out my response). And there ‘it’ was … I was shocked, I was excited, I was unable to act … I was naturally thrilled! Hubby had taken an old chair that I had paid a dollar for at a junkyard (over twenty years ago), to be refinished and reupholstered. It was beautifully redeemed, and I loved it.

Now that is the kind of uncertainty I can handle!

I was recently in church singing along, and an example of certainty hit me in the face, and caused tears to flow from my eyes.

“No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand.”

As I read and sang those words … no power of hell, no scheme of man … that means nothing on earth, or beyond the earth … nothing, can ever separate me from Christ. There is nothing that any man or woman can do to me, there is no demonic pressure that can sever the tie that exists between my redeemer and me. There is nothing that even I can do to break that tie.

This is certainty! And this is what I hold on to till He returns, or calls me home.

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Preferred Fruit

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #fruitofthespirit, #ilovefruit, #knownbyourfruit, #preferredfruit, #producefruit, #thevine, Life on August 18, 2014| 2 Comments »

I love almost all fruits that I have ever tasted.

I love the sweetness

the juice they produce

and the way I feel after eating fruit.

Earlier today I was thinking about fruit too, but a different kind of fruit.

The fruit I was thinking about was the kind that is not edible, but it can be palatable. It is not something you can pick off a branch and hold in your hand, but when it is there it is all that you can see, and smell. It is not something that provides a taste of sweetness, but it’s absence can leave a sour taste in ones mouth. It is the fruit that comes from a living, nourished, well-watered life rooted in the Creator.

By no means am I indicating that I am a living example of that fruit, but it is a goal that I have for my life. I know how sweet my life is when I am connected to the branches of the Creator. I know of the amazing things that can be produced, that can happen, when I am producing the fruit I was intended to produce. I know how wonderful I feel, how purpose-led my days are when I am taking in the aroma, the energy of the God who lives.

When my life is rooted in the soil of the Creator

I am healthy

I am growing

I am sweet (desirable to be with) for those around me.

When I look at trees in an orchard, I cannot tell what trees they are. But, when I look at the fruit, hanging off their branches, it is easy to identify what types of trees they are. It is by their fruit that I know them.

In the same way, for many people, the only way they know who the Creator is, is by His creation. And His most spectacular creation is that of humankind. We are his creation, and how we live our daily lives is the fruit of His creation. It is through the fruit of our lives that others can see where we are rooted, what is feeding us, who makes us grow, and whether or not we are sweet (desirable to be with).

Some days (weeks, months … years) I am pretty sour, or poorly rooted, or malnourished, or withered. And it is never because of the Creator … but is always because I have not responded well to the pruning (struggles), or I spent too long focusing on receiving the watering (selfishness), or the light (the externals), or I am overly concerned about growing farther away from my roots (independence). If only I would focus on where I am planted, and recognize that it is only through the purposes of my Creator that I can thrive where I am, and produce the sweetest of His fruits.

What is produced in my life, is only a reflection of what I am attached to, and of who is granting me life. And this is only possible as I relinquish control, and allow the nature of my Creator God to produce the fruit in my life. And that is good fruit … always in season.

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Another Look at Worship

Posted in GOD, WONDER, tagged #anotherlookatworship, #betterthanahallelujah, #thelordgives, #thelordtakesaway, Job, Offering, Suffering, Worship on August 15, 2014| Leave a Comment »

Yesterday I wrote about worship. I touched on the example of Job who praised God, even in the midst of losing every earthly thing that a man or woman could hold dear. His is not an easy example to follow, but I do believe that his response to adversity is one worth aiming to mirror in our lives.

One of the difficulties of reading the Bible is that we cannot always be clear as to how a person is saying the words that they say. We are missing key elements of communication. We do not always know what words in their sentences are emphasized more (or less), we do not know how their face looked, and we do not know if they rolled their eyes while they were talking (I have teenagers in my house, and something like ‘yes mom’ can have so many different meanings, depending on how it is said, what they are doing with their bodies and what their eyes are doing).

Our communication is so so much clearer when we experience it face to face.

But we do not have that opportunity when we read the Bible, so we are left to guess, assume, and input our own take on just how things might have been communicated. I, being an internal processor, would tend to go with the third option, that of inputting my own take on just how things might have been communicated.

When I think of the disasters, disappointments and losses that Job faced, I am pretty confident that he did not say, in a way that my kids might announce an A+ on their Math test, “The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away, praise the name of the Lord.” I also do not think he made that announcement as a question. I also do not think that he said what he did without tears of true and sincere pain falling down his cheeks.

I believe that God heard Jobs cry, I believe that God accepted Jobs praise, through his lament, through his tears and through his not seeing or understanding the big picture that God could see. And, I believe that Jobs tear-filled praise of the name of the Lord was sweeter than honey to the ears of God. Not because Job gave God praise that was due to Him (although it was), but because despite the outer turmoil that Job was facing and experiencing, head on, he gave his praise to God … anyway. He praised because that was what he was created to do. It was his main purpose, and he was fulfilling it … even though he was suffering.

God does not ask for the sugar-coated prayers and praises that we so often give (in public). God asks for prayers and praise that are saturated in the tears of his children. He wants our offering to Him to be one that we deliver on the alter … one that took effort and sacrifice. One that came from the heart … the heart of His child.

I hate suffering! I honestly do wish that I could live my life on easy street, and have every wish granted before I speak it. I do wish that there were guarantees in this life. But, that is not real life, here in our sin-filled world. I also have to say that the times when my heart felt as though it might be ripped in two (or I wished that it would be) by the pain I was feeling, are also the times when I was most real to God. I scream, I shout, I cry … I forfeit … yes, I give up. It is then, when I am so worn out, so discouraged, and feeling so hopeless that I finally hand control of my life back over to the only one who can control my life … my creator, my savior my redeemer.

That giving up of control, is when God takes over. Because we have been sincere in our heart, He is able to mold our lives.

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Crying Rocks

Posted in GOD, life, WONDER, tagged #apatheticworship, #blessedbethename, #cryingrocks, #luke19:40, #psalm29:2, apathy, Church, Job, Life, Praise, Worship on August 14, 2014| 2 Comments »

It was a Sunday morning when, although I was fighting a miserable cold, the joy of singing in corporate worship to my Creator was such a joyful experience and privilege.

Until, I started to look around the sanctuary. I was dismayed to see many people not worshiping. There were people standing with their mouths closed. There were people sitting reading their bulletins. There were people sitting … staring straight ahead. There were people standing, looking around the room … oups! That was me too!

I found myself to be very critical of those who I was watching. Until I realized that maybe there were reasons for their non-participation in worship.

Maybe some of them were dealing with sorrows so deep, so dark that they could not open their mouths to sing the words. Or maybe they had been dealing with illness or physical conditions that are so debilitating that they could no longer sing songs of joy. Or maybe there were those who were facing their own private financial crises, with their demise, the demise of their family just around the next corner. Or, maybe they simply cannot sing … now that I can so relate to (well, my family can relate to my lack of vocal abilities).

So, I turned my head towards the lyrics of the song on the screen at the front of the room, and continued my own participation in the corporate worship:

“Blessed be Your name
When I’m found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I’ll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord”

And I thought, oh how I love this worship song, because it parallels the biblical story of Job … the man who God allowed Satan to take away all that was of earthly value to him. Job was inflicted with painful sores on his skin, his lively hood was destroyed, his children and wife died. And, through all of that, how did Job respond? “The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.”

But wait, that means that Job had suffered sorrows, illness, financial crises and earthly loss of family members … just like the possible reasons (excuses?) I had guessed that people in church might not be singing.

But wait!

There is one difference … Job kept praising the Lord.

May I not forget that despite all that Job lost of what he loved, despite the pain, the sorrow, the loss and the personal crises that Job faced, he never stopped praising the Lord.

“Give to the Lord the glory due to His name;

worship the Lord in the beauty of holiness or in holy array.”

Psalm 29:2

“I tell you, if they (you … His disciples) keep quiet,

even the rocks will cry out.”

Luke 19:40

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Depression

Posted in GOD, life, The Kids, WONDER, tagged Depression, GOD, Ink Stains, Pain, Redemption, Revelations, Sadness, Sorrow on August 13, 2014| Leave a Comment »

“Depression is an ink that stains everything it touches
A black hole that swallows all that comes near”
-The Beaver (movie)

I do not personally know the truth or fallacy in the quote above. I do know that as I look back at times when I was sad, when I was feeling downcast those words are so true. Looking back on those periods in my life, I can see the stains that were left on those around me, even today.

It is easy to forget, or not even be aware, that we are part of a bigger world than just ourselves, and that things that happen to us, affect those around us. It is the relational evidence of the scientific fact that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. So when we are overwhelmed with pain or sorrow or frustrations, we are not the only ones to feel the effects … all those closest to us feel our reactions, and then they, in turn, also respond.

As a mom (I cannot speak for dads) I am naturally predisposed to guilt. I can look over the well-intended mothering that I have done, and see errors that I made that will surely result in therapy for my kids in years to come. Yes, I have forced them to clean their plates, at times. Yes, I yelled at them more than once (a day). Yes, I sent them to their rooms to await discipline … and forgot them. Yes, I made them clean their rooms. Yes, they are all aware that that their not at all skinny parents have skinny dipped (that one may send them to therapy for longer and sooner than any other, if their faces turning green when they discovered this is any indicator).

There are certain periods in our life together, when I thought I was hiding my own disappointments and sadness with life’s circumstances so well, and as I look back, and look at changes in their lives, I am aware that too were stained by my sadness. It is such a guilt-ridden thing when I see those stains that they wear, because of me. My inability, at times, to manage and deal with events in my life better, have permanently stained my children …

I am coming full circle now, though. And I am looking to see purpose in suffering, I am looking to see good from bad. I am looking to see that something positive, not just negative, can come from those stains. And I am beginning to see it.

I see a daughter’s sensitivity to a friend who is being stained by sadness and illness in her home. I see a son’s expression of his friends need of God. I see a daughter’s desire to go to those in desperate pain and need, in a place I would not want to go, to show love and mercy. Those times of sorrow for me, that were permanently etched into the beings of my children, have altered their hearts. They have been able to take the stains that I have caused, and are wearing them as certificates of accomplishment and experience. And these stains are being used to reach out to others, more desperate than their mother ever was.

The redemptive way that God can take our pain, and mold it into something beautiful for others is something I do not expect to ever understand this side of heaven. But, I am thankful that the stains I may have caused, have not swallowed the futures of my children.

“God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes;

and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain;

the first things have passed away.”

And He who sits on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.”

And He said, “Write, for these words are faithful and true.”

Then He said to me, “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end.

I will give to the one who thirsts from the spring of the water of life without cost.

He who overcomes will inherit these things, and I will be his God and he will be My son (daughter).

Revelation 21:4-7

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