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This Summer in Review

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged A Different Summer, Life, Summer, Summer is Over, Vacation, Work on September 6, 2011| 2 Comments »

This summer was different than most. And it was certainly not the summer I had planned or hoped for.

I worked for half of it, and the other half was spent with two Korean student house guests, and two Chinese student guests / new family members (they will be living with us for the school year). It was also different, because the warm summer weather was delayed, slow, and at times non-existent.

There are things that have been staples in our home and family, that just didn’t happen this summer. Things like daily swims in the pool (we have become wimps … and just do not go in the pool on cool or overcast days), nightly ‘tribal councils’ (we sit out under the stars to the light of the tiki torches, laughing and talking … and texting each other … while only a couple of feet apart), summer school work (I usually give my kids summer school work, to keep their brains engaged over the summer, but working made it hard to find the time … this is something that my kids have NOT missed 🙂 … I have never seen them so happy about me working. But, I digress), and a time away for all five of us 😦

The following is a wrap up of my summer:

Days when I did not have to leave the house … ZERO 😦

Days I had morning coffee on the deck … THREE

Days of temperature over thirty degrees … TWO

School lessons taught … ZERO (Mom 😦 … TWEEN kids 😀 )

Nights of ‘tribal council’ … THREE

Books read … ONE HALF (thanks to my flights to and from New Brunswick)

Pool parties … ZERO

Toes dipped into Pacific … ten

Toes dipped into Atlantic … ten

Korean students our family got to host … TWO

Chinese students who have become part of our family (for the whole school year) … TWO

Camps our two youngest attended … THREE

Summer debt accumulated … ZERO (thanks to my summer job). And every minute and hour of it were worth it! I got to work with fantastic people, learned much new information, and got a paycheck.

Was I loving working in the summer all the time? NO! I did have a ‘poor me’ day, where I griped and complained to hubby that I was working my tushie off and would have nothing tangible to show for it. Last week, as we were admiring the brick patio (bricks that we had, largely bought used … transported here, then carried up our mountain of a property) that our friend (who we had hired when it became obvious that we would not have time this summer to complete on our own) laid for us. And hubby instructed me to look at it, and see that my extra working did have something tangible to show for it.

And, it was good.

So, it was a different summer. It was not the one I had planned on having. Working was not what I had wanted to do. But different is not bad, it’s just … different.

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School without Students

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged Back to School, Back to work, Purpose, School is Students, Work on September 2, 2011| 4 Comments »

Having now been back to work, in a school, for three days, I am confident of one thing … school is not school without the students!

It has been wonderful to see and reconnect with my work colleagues, get my schedule, and hear of the new plans and initiatives for the school year. But … it does not feel like my job, it does not feel like school, if there are no students there. The building is NOT the school, even the staff are not the school. Both of those are valuable parts of ‘school’, but it is the students who make up, and who are … the school.

All parts that come together under the roof of the school, from teaching to non-teaching staff, from parents to guardians, from professional development to textbooks, from note pads to computers, do so with one purpose in mind … to teach the students who will attend there. And it is in they, the students, that our purpose for being there lies.

It has been a good reminder to me of what my job is really about. Although I benefit from my job (financially and with a sense of purpose and fulfillment), I am there for the benefit of the students, not the other way around. I am there to help them to learn, they are not there to help me learn (but, they do). I am there to encourage them, not they encourage me (but, they do). I am there to make their lives and their futures better, they are not there to improve my life (but, they do).

I hope that remembering why I do what I was hired to do helps me to do my job better. I hope that a month from now, I can remember how very boring and even pointless (not that it is, but it ‘feels’ that way) being at school without the students was, way back here in August.

The highlight of my day … meeting the family of one of the students I get to work with this coming school year … That was one step closer to what I was hired to do!

“…the fundamental purpose of school is learning, not teaching.”

Richard DuFour

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When I think of New Brunswick

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged 80's Music, Bilingualism, Chivalry, East Coast, Fast Food, New Brunswick, Vacation on August 31, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Having spent a week in my childhood home in New Brunswick, this summer on my own, I had ample opportunity to consider what it is that defines the province, and it’s people, for me since I am no longer ‘one of them.’

Really being or not being ‘one of them’ is a good place to start. Even though I have been ‘away’ for nearly twenty-one years (and about half of my life), if I were to return, I would be viewed as from there. Whereas a person who has lived there for the past twenty-one years might be viewed as from someplace else, or ‘not from here’, or even new. This is a reality that I was very aware of while I still lived there, and it is reality for any small or predominantly mono-cultural community. Even a small culture within a larger one. It is why, in a larger metropolitan area similar people groups come together. It is just one that has always amused me, when I go back for a visit (and, of course every visit includes at least one query of “so when are you moving back?”).

On another note, chivalry is not dead in New Brunswick! I do not think that I opened a door to a store or other business the entire time I was there. One day I was entering a McDonalds restaurant when a guy ran past me and opened, not just the exterior door for me, but the interior one as well (I contemplated asking him if he could follow me to the restrooms, so that I didn’t have to open those doors either).

Then there was another day … when I was going to McDonalds again (really I did not spend my entire vacation at McDonald restaurants … I was simply enjoying a coffee and free wi-fi). When I was at the paying, I asked my server if there was an outlet where I could charge my computer, while accessing the wi-fi. She said, “yes there is one, but … Joe is sitting there. As soon as your coffee is up, I will go ask him if he would move to another table.” I did not respond, because I was moving her words around, and around my head, trying to figure out if what I had heard, was indeed what she had said.

Sure enough, off she scurried to ‘Joe’s’ table! And Joe was more than willing to unplug his charging computer, and move to another table, so that I could plug mine in! My head was swirling with wonder … When I finally came to my senses, I suggested to Joe that if he wanted, he could stay right there, and we could share the table (and the outlet). And so he did. And so we two strangers, sat across from each other charging, and typing, and sipping on our coffee, with periodic comments about the weather.

And, speaking of fast food restaurants in New Brunswick … can you say oxymoron? There is nothing FAST in New Brunswick! The day I was at McDonalds, when the guy was opening any door in front of me, there was a lineup of at least twenty people inside, and the cars were around the restaurant, and to the road on the outside. And the employees had the deer in the headlights look … you know looking at the problem in front of them, and not moving a muscle to get let the traffic pass.

Part of the slow service (everywhere) is that New Brunswickers are a very social and friendly people. They will chat your ear off as you are paying for a purchase, asking about your day, where you are from, why you are there (as a former resident of the province, let me tell you, their motivation is not all about being friendly … they are nosy as can be and … you are not from there).

If you are in New Brunswick (or, really, any province from Ontario east) you will notice bilingualism everywhere. Every sign on the road, every government publication, every service from business to public, is available in both English and French. New Brunswick became Canada’s first (and still only) officially bilingual province in 1969 (a very good year 😉 ). The francophone community makes up about one third of the population of the province, with most being Acadian. But, my knowledge of french, in this bilingual province, is far more commonly known there as franglaise … a little french and a little english combined … it makes understanding both languages so much easier 🙂 .

I now live in another province with (unofficial) bilingualism (multilingualism) … but, it is far more related to where the province is going than where it has been. There are no ‘official’ indicators (signs, publications, etc.), but multiculturalism abounds. So, it is always a bit strange when it is everywhere I look while visiting New Brunswick.

There is one more thing I think of when I think of New Brunswick … 80’s music. I am not sure how it happens, but every time I go there, I end up having a rental car thats radio is set to a station that plays hits from the 1980’s. And, every time I am there, I do not really notice the radio station until I have been there for a number of days. I expect that I do not notice because I moved from New Brunswick in 1990 … so the sounds of Kenny Loggins, or Phil Collins or Billy Joel ‘fit’ that environment 😉

I love the salty smell in the air. I love the rolling hills. I love the horizon that goes on forever. I love the red-hued mud of the Bay of Fundy. I love the constant breeze. I love the seafood. I love the covered bridges. I love the sunrises. I love the red autumn leaves. I love the feet of snow, accompanied by the bright sunshine, in winter. I love the sounds of people speaking franglaise. I love the people. These are the things that define New Brunswick, for me … they are they things I miss, and the things that feel innately familiar when I am there.

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Back to Work … Sigh …

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged Back to work, Begin with the End in Mind, End of Vacation, Hi Ho Hi Ho, Purpose, Start of the School Year on August 29, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Beginnings are great! A fresh start, a clean slate, a new page. Well, after a two month (well, for me it was more like a two week) break from working in a school, today is back to work … sigh (for those of you who do not work in on a school schedule, I realize that you will be playing your miniature violins, as I whine and complain about the end of summer break. I know the perspectives of non-school workers of those of us who work a school schedule … ‘you work less than eight hours a day,’ ‘you get two weeks off at Christmas,’ ‘you get two weeks off at Spring Break,’ ‘you get two months off in the summer,’ ‘there seems to be a Professional day every month’ and on, and on, and on. I have broad shoulders, I can handle it 😉 But, I digress).

I am not really all that upset about actually going back to work, I am more sad to see the end of summer. Although it really is not over until about the twenty-first of September, the start of school always seems to be the real, practical, end of the summer season. And really, is there anyone who wants to see the end of summer? I don’t think so!

So, my alarm will be set for 6am, my clothes will be laid out the night before (I’m a bit anal … no, really it is just that I do not want anything to hinder my joy of a relaxing morning coffee, and having to think about what to wear just simply throws me off), my coffee maker timer set, and my cell phone charged (not that I would use my cell phone, at work, to text … not me 😉 ). All of the regular work preparations have been done, now it is just to get my pea-sized brain around this reality.

Really there is no preparation for getting my brain wrapped around the reality of back to work. A person just has to do it, go through the motions, leap into it (kind of like getting married, or having a child).

I do look forward to catching up with co-workers, meeting new colleagues, and hearing about new and exciting plans and perspectives on various things pertaining to our students this year.

This summer I heard someone say, ‘begin with the end in mind.’ It seemed so simple, yet so profound a statement. It is a statement of understanding goals, consequences, hope and vision. It is a statement that makes me think about what I hope the end to look like.

I wonder … if I go to work each day of this school year, with an end goal in mind, for me, for the students I work with … will each of my work days have more focus, more direction, more accomplishment, more purpose? Will having a ‘end’ perspective make me more attentive, more directed, more eager to do the job I am hired to do? Will I be better at my job? Will I receive more joy from the work I do? Will my students catch the excitement that I feel to be there, as we work together to achieve their goals?

So, tomorrow is a day of catching up, of getting reacquainted and of visioning for the year to come … all with the end in mind.

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The Long and Winding Road to Public Restrooms

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged dark corridors., East Coast, gotta pee, Life, the long and winding road, Women on August 25, 2011| Leave a Comment »

It was a dark and stormy night … well, actually it was a humid and sunny afternoon … but it doesn’t really matter, because the foreboding inner feeling was the same.

I was in a shopping mall, doing a little shopping for a few little trinkets to bring home to my kids (okay, trinkets might be the wrong word … it just has connotations of a grandmother who is obsessive compulsive about little ornaments and ‘do-dads’, and her house is littered with them … providing ample opportunity to spend hours each week dusting, polishing and moving from place to place … but, I digress), when, all of a sudden I got an urge to pee (and, anyone who has given birth knows that an urge like that only means one thing … making it to the bathroom on time is like living with a ticking time bomb … never knowing just when, or how cataclysmic the explosion might be).

As I visually sought out those classic symbols of the restroom … the next step up from stick people, one wearing pants, and the other a dress, I fought to not allow my fear of the unknown get to me. I needed to maintain my composure and dignity, and not go off running through the mall like a maniac, yelling ‘I gotta pee, where do I go to go?’

And there they were, the mr. and the ms. (I wanted to say mrs., but thought that might not be politically correct … although I am not sure that singling out women by a dress or skirt is very politically correct), hanging from a sign on the ceiling, like a beacon from a lighthouse, as the waves of … well as the waves were quickly surrounding me. But, my agony would not be relieved as soon as one might think.

Sure enough, finding the sought-after sign was not the end of my urgent problem, but the beginning of a new one.

As with many times in the past, I was in a public place and had to walk past the mens washroom, down a maze-like corridor with twists and turns (and often burnt out light bulbs) just to relieve my post-pregnancy bladder. As I make the turns I am sure that I will leave more that just a carbon footprint. I am also sure that there will be some pervert lurking around the next dark corner.

Have you ever noticed the locations of men’s restrooms and women’s rest rooms in public places? It has been my finding (after a lifetime of active, full-bladdered research) that, almost exclusively, womens restrooms are a further walk than the mens rest rooms.

What exactly are the designers and builders of these fine establishments thinking? There is a part of me that whispers every time this happens … ‘probably designed by a man.’ Whoever it is that is doing the designing and creating of public restrooms, needs to start doing the designs while their bladder is full … so that they can design from a position of need.

And speaking of sitting down on the job, really is there anything on this Earth that can provide as much instant pleasure and relief, like emptying your bladder? And really, this is why bathrooms are poorly designed … because the act of emptying ones bladder is so wonderful that, when it is over, the trail that led there is forgotten, until the next time that it strikes again.

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As Far as the East is from the West …

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged canada, East Coast, Flying Home, How Far the East is from the West, Life, Saying Goodbyes, Vacation on August 24, 2011| 2 Comments »

The day began as most have, while visiting my parents. I awake at least a half hour before my alarm goes off … despite not feeling rested, and having awakened numerous times in the night. As soon as my mind awakens, so does my bladder … and it’s an urgent awakening (how does that happen? You are sleeping comfortably, but as soon as your mind awakens to the day, your bladder is doing a 911 call).

After a shower, tea and homemade biscuits (tomorrow I will start the day with coffee and a ten mile hike, to try to work off these biscuits), we were off to the airport.

Gone are the days of ‘super packing’ your suitcase with whatever would fit … now they weigh your bags, and not just to save the backs of the luggage handlers … but also as money-making scam (I am sure the airlines public logic is in keeping with being more environmentally responsible … but I still see it as an airline money-maker, otherwise more conservative packers would be offered a rebate from the airlines). All of that to say, I was required to do a bit of re-packing of my goods, and was sad to not be able to bring back the entire case of Simply Crispie (www.topfundraisers.ca/chocbars.htm) chocolate bars … sorry kids!

After tears filled our eyes (but, we are far too … mature to let them fall …), I entered airport security. A friendly security gentleman asked, before I was even able to breath yet, how I was doing today … all I could respond was ‘tormented’.

I passed through security, boarded my flight to Montreal. There I waited for over two hours … texting hubby, emailing, writing, people watching. And then on to my final destination … Vancouver, BC.

Anyone with loved ones who live away from where you live understands my ‘tormented’ response to the security personnel. Each farewell you are tormented with two realities. One is that your life is not where their life is, and the other is that each farewell could be a final one.

It is then that I am acutely aware how far the east is from the west. It is not like we can drive there in a day, or fly there in a couple of hours … we cannot even fly directly there from where we live. It takes planning, and effort to get together.

This day was really heavy for me … leaving always is. And I am not expecting it to get easier or lighter anytime soon. Because we live in such a large, such a vast country … and as the plane touched down on the west coast … nine and a half hours after taking flight from the east coast I was so very aware of how far the east is from the west.

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It’s a Wonderfilled Summer Recipe Biscuits

Posted in Recipe, WONDER, tagged Biscuits, Brittany Biscuits, Delicious, East Coast, Homemade Biscuits, Recipe, Scones, Starbucks on August 19, 2011| 4 Comments »

I figured that since I am at my parents house, and since the best, most requested food served here, is my Dad’s biscuits, that is what today’s recipe would be.

Now, you may call them scones (or ‘scons’, which really is only the pronunciation if you speak with a British accent) if you wish … but, biscuits is what they are called under this roof … always have been, always will be. If I were to get really specific, I would tell you they are called ‘Brittany Biscuits’ but, biscuits will do just fine.

This recipe is not really a summertime recipe, as you have to turn your oven on. But, since they are so good, and since my parents have air conditioning (and since my mother likes to keep the house at igloo-like temperatures), it works here to have them in the summer. Plus, they make for great ‘cakes’ for strawberry (blueberry, raspberry, etc.) shortcakes … see, I can make any recipe a summertime recipe.

It would probably be good to mention that this recipe makes enough for a crowd … a big, ugly, east coast family crowd (in laws and outlaws). When my dad makes it, he stores most of it, in the refrigerator, to be used at a later date. This way he can make fresh biscuits for his favorite daughter (okay, only daughter) every morning (I so do not want to be reminded that the day of my reckoning with my scales is coming … ever so quickly … but, I digress).

The ingredients are simple, and most you should already have on hand (except for the shortening, that we have told is so very bad for us, due to the trans fats … personally, I use butter, but I have to say that shortening does honor the quality of taste, so much better). And the time factor is really pretty short … within about half an hour you can be peeling your first one open (and within an hour you will need to be rolled away from the table).

First off, preheat your oven to 405 degrees F. This temperature may differ depending on the elevation at which you live, and the humidity in the air.

Then you need to fetch the biggest bowl in the house (aka, the popcorn bowl … if you love popcorn like I do … and I am not talking about the dreadful microwave variety). Into it you need to measure 8 cups of all-purpose flour (if you want to add more nutritional value you could use have whole wheat flour … but I think it’s really a waste of time … they are biscuits, not toast, you are not making biscuits for their nutritional value, you make them because they are so freaking tasty), 1/3 cup of baking powder (check the expiry date on the container, if it has expired, the biscuits will not rise … and biscuit-style hockey pucks are not appealing), 2 teaspoons of salt, and 3 teaspoons of sugar. Now traditionally these ingredients would be sifted together, but I whisk them once they are in the bowl, and my dad (whose recipe it is, and who is the only person who can really make them taste like they should) probably uses a fork or wooden spoon … if he mixes them together at all, before cutting in 1 cup of shortening (Fluffo … it is what Dad uses, so I have to tell you) with a pastry blender.

Once all of the ingredients look well combined, and similar in appearance to oats, it is time to get messy!

And I do not just mean physically … my dad’s measurements get a little vague at this point … So, now you can refrigerate your ‘mix’, and take out as much as you want, whenever you want. And when you are ready to bake biscuits til they are browned beautifully (I so love alliteration … it is the only figure of speech that I really understand), place as much ‘mix’ in a bowl as you would like (start with about two cups). Make a well in the center of the mix. Then comes the milk and (sigh) this is where my dad takes after his mother … he says to add as much as is needed …

I know, I feel your pain! I am anal too … I need specific measurements! So, here is my guide … add a bit at a time (say about 1/4 cup) and stir with a fork, until the dough is soft, and it pulls away from (instead of sticks to) the sides of the bowl. Once that feat is accomplished, turn the dough out onto a floured surface (maybe the counter top).

Now knead it until it is done … OR about 10-15 times 😉 Then roll to about 1″ thickness, and cut with a cutter, or glass into round biscuits (or, live on the edge and just cut them into squares, or rectangles, or hearts, or … oh, how my undiagnosed ADD is surfacing now … maybe Pac-Man?). Keep rolling and cutting until all the dough is used. My dad’s ritual includes making a ‘hot dog’ … this is where he takes the last bit of dough (more than the amount for one ‘normal’ biscuit), and forming it into the cylindrical shape of a hot dog. This is the MOST COVETED biscuit in the bunch! It is bigger than the rest, and it is … different! If Dad places the ‘hot dog’ biscuit on your plate … you are the favorite person at that meal!

Lay them on an ungreased baking sheet. And bake for 12-15 minutes … until the tops are golden brown.

Now, eat them IMMEDIATELY! Warm is better than cold, but hot is better than warm.

On my parents table is jam (strawberry ONLY), peanut butter, cheese whiz (blech!), and margarine (they have never been a ‘butter’ family). Personally, I do not need to add a thing to them … just open them up, and feel the heat of the steam warm your cheeks as you go in for your first bite … delicious!

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It’s a Wonderfilled Summer Recipe Broccoli Salad

Posted in Recipe, WONDER, tagged Bacon, Broccoli Salad, Healthy, Recipe, Unhealthy on August 12, 2011| Leave a Comment »

So we got back from our vacation where the sights were purdy, the people were sweet, and the food (that I did not have to make) divine! And … I got weighed yesterday … sigh! So, because of that, you will have to suffer with summer recipes that are … sigh, healthier.

Today, I opened my recipe books to see what I could share with you that is healthier … and found myself being drawn to anything but! So, I have decided to incorporate healthy and unhealthy … all in one recipe 🙂 … I am thinking of it as the middle ground between the two.

Today I will share my recipe for Broccoli Salad … it is a staple salad at any picnic, BBQ and party! And, like all of my recipes, it is so easy peasie!

The first step is to measure 6 cups of broccoli florets into a mid sized to large bowl. I hate it when broccoli salad has chunks of broccoli that make it impossible to chew and talk (without florets spraying all over the face of the person you are talking with) at the same time, so I cut it into lady-sized pieces 🙂

Then, in another bowl (but I just use my large glass measuring cup, that holds all the ingredients, and I can whip it in there too. This comes from y e a r s of dish washing, as a kid, when I made sure that as few dishes as possible were dirtied, because I knew I would have to wash them. On a side note, my parents got a dishwasher … AFTER I moved out … coincidence? I think not! But, I digress) add 3/4 cup of mayonnaise (you could use light or fat free if you are looking to lessen your guilt OR give yourself an excuse to eat more), 2 tablespoons of white vinegar and 2 tablespoons of sugar. Whip these ingredients together.

Then chop up 1 small red onion into small diced pieces. Add onion and 1/2 cup of real bacon bits (this would be the ‘unhealthy’ part of the recipe … and the delicious part. You can slave over a grease splattered stove if you want, but I am … lazy, and I purchase the precooked, packaged variety) to the dressing, and mix together.

Pour dressing mixture over broccoli, and stir.

You can also add raisons or nuts (almonds or pine nuts) if you like … we do not like, so we do not add 😉 .

This salad really is better if it gets to sit, all mixed together, in your refrigerator for about four hours … I think it is so that the flavors can get to know each other better 😉

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In a Funk

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged Exhaustion, In a Funk, Life is about moments that take our breath away, Sunset, Wonder on August 11, 2011| 2 Comments »

I knew it would come, I just didn’t know when. And it came with a vengeance!

After a school year of joys and trials, after a couple of months of busyness, after a wonderful week away … exhaustion set in … today.

It all began in the morning with faux pas number one … getting on the scales (after a week of being ever so well fed, on vacation). Lets just say I will be getting reacquainted with foods that are green, and bidding adieu to anything beige! How depressing!

As the day wore on, so did my energy (despite doubling my caffeine intake). I forgot the scales when I chose lunch, and (the worst decision of all) I agreed to ‘do calendars’ with hubby. Not that doing calendars is such an awful event, but that, for me, to actually talk and write down just how busy we are, is a reality I prefer to not face!

And then, while discussing with hubby and son the possibilities of bedroom changes, I felt a horrible, uncontrollable fatigue and sense of overwhelming. There was no way that even I could imagine accomplishing all that needed to be done. I had to find something to accomplish!

So, I cleaned a couple of kitchen cupboards. You know, removed everything, wiped the shelves clean, and put everything back in an organized ‘everything has it’s own place’ kind of way (well everything, except for the mounds of stuff I still need to put … somewhere …).

It felt so good, but I was still in a funk … could be because hubby and I were heading to a meeting at a bank (the financial equivalent of going to the dentist). But that wasn’t really so bad … Mr. Banker had good news 🙂 and that was a miracle in itself.

Still in a funk, I insisted on coffee number three (which could be why I am writing this late into the night). Then I had a plan to take our International students for fish and chips and a walk at the water’s edge (honestly, it was not something I was doing out of love, or enjoyment, or even desire … at all … it was simply something to do … how is that for brutal honesty?).

The fish and chips were great. We played hangman with them (my son and I). Then for a walk to, and on the pier … at sunset …

And, as we walked towards the pier, with the sun slowly lowering itself into the horizon, something started to shift within me. Maybe it was the beauty of the evening. Maybe it was the sounds of the surf. Or the marmot nibbling on the cool green grass, as we walked by (and took dozens of pictures). Maybe it was the wonder of two teenage boys as they saw new sights, climbed a big tacky white rock, pointed at starfish, and watched boys their age setting crab traps.

I think it was the wonder of all of those things. Those moments that reminded me that life includes, but is not about weight loss (or gain), money or schedules or accomplishments or cleaning. But life is about the things that both give us breath, and take it away. And, as the sun disappeared into the trees, my spirits took flight .

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Life Stories

Posted in life, WONDER, tagged Heart Connection, Life Story, Listen, Stories on August 10, 2011| 2 Comments »

When you ask someone to tell you their story, you have opened up a line of conversation that is intimate, clear and overflowing … with emotion and with sincerity. Being willing and available to hear their story is like imprinting yourself into their heart (and into their life).

This reality became so very true to me as I did home visits for a contract job this summer.

Each day I would knock on the door of a complete stranger, and they would welcome me in. Most times, their welcome was guarded, uneasy and downright awkward … for them, and for me.

And then one day I was heading to the home of an older lady, who I had heard might not be very friendly. This was not a visit I was looking forward to, so I decided to go with a plan. I figured if she was older, there would be photos … so I would ask about the people in them. And I figured you ‘catch more bees with honey’ so I would compliment at every opportunity. So, I drove to her home with my plan in my head. And, lo and behold, as I drove up, I noticed a tree in her garden that I have, but I didn’t know how or when to trim it.

As she came to the door, I introduced myself, and thanked her for allowing me to visit. Then I launched into (sincerely curious questions) about the tree. We chatted outside, then went inside, where I noticed her many family photos … grandbabies, children at various stages, family photos, and her deceased husband. It was then that I forgot about my ‘paid’ purpose in visiting her, and I listened fully to her stories of how her husband died, events surrounding it (with tears welling up in both of our eyes), and then bits and pieces of their life’s love story together. Eventually we did get to the ‘real’ reason for my being there …

My plan in doing home visits, with an intent of finding a connection I could make outside of my purpose for being there, became my daily goal. It combined my paid purpose for being in the homes, and my ability to listen, to really hear people. And I think it worked.

I heard stories of great vacations, dear relationships formed with International students, illnesses (and I am currently awaiting an email to tell me what a ladies mammogram results were), deaths, many stories of family love and loss and separation. There were stories of joy and sorrow and everything in between.

I am sure I have never spent so many hours each day in prayer, as I did during those two months. Most days I would leave a home, and then pray for that person, that family all the way to the next visit.

And then, as I met up with many of them the other day, I was greeted by hugs, smiles and warm greetings. And I knew, our relationships were not simply all about business, but we had made a heart connection with each other. All because they were allowed to tell their stories. I sat and listened, and they poured out a heaping cup of themselves to me.

And I was blessed.

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