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Posts Tagged ‘Daughters’

As a parent who believes in prayer, praying for my kids has been a regular thing since even before they were conceived.

One of the realities of prayer is that it is really more about me, than the one who I am praying for, as I do agree with C.S. Lewis who said, “prayer changes me” in this clip from his Shadowlands story.

But this is not something that I was fully aware of when I was a young mom. In the early days of motherhood I prayed, anticipating that God would grant my every request. Much like Santa with my gift list at Christmas time, I think that I subconsciously believed that if I was obedient to Him (kind of the equivalent to “being a good little girl”) then God would reward me by meeting my every wish and desire that was expressed in my prayers to Him. I may have even believed that I deserved to have my prayers answered.

When my children were young I prayed that they would grow up healthy, would make wise choices, and that they would be opened to God’s leading in their future decisions, especially surrounding their choice of friends, career and their choice of future spouse. These are all good, and I am not saying that I do not wish those things for them, but that I now wish even more for them.

The reality is that character rarely is developed without the exposure to temptation, life is not fully appreciated without the threat of or reality of loss, some of the best choices in life are made on the heels of the stupidest mistakes in our lives, love is rarely long lasting without enduring the struggles, and dependence on God rarely comes without a season of questioning His ways.

Really, the best things in our lives have often been born out of disaster, death and despair. Failures, mistakes and heartbreaks have a way of opening our eyes to what really matters to us, they have a way of drawing us to cling to God like nothing else.

I don’t pray for disaster for our kids, but I also have lived long enough to know that the greatest growth in life can come from the greatest difficulties. I also have lived long enough to know that life is hard, mistakes get made and difficulties will come to everyone in time.

Now I pray that they might have strength, grace and courage when the rough stuff of life happens, and that they might grow closer to their Heavenly Father through it all.

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Tonight my daughters and I had a ‘girl date’ with Bruno Mars. This is the concert that has altered the schedule of the NHL playoffs 😀 Kind of increased our giggly enjoyment!

The tickets were purchased as birthday gifts to my now fourteen year old, and my ‘to be’ nineteen year old. The three of us have never gone to a concert … just us, so it was fun and exciting.

So to the concert we went.

The sun was shining (and, considering our wet and cold spring … that was a near miracle), and the traffic insane (but that is ALWAYS the case in the Lower Mainland of BC). We made a stop at Ikea for a cheap dinner 😀 (it always tastes better when it is cheap!), and for a bit of window shopping (something only a girl can understand … hubby writes a list, goes where he will find what he wants, pick it out, pays for it, and goes home … b o r i n g !).

We parked, walked along the shining waters of False Creek, laughing and giggling … mostly about ourselves and about boys … any boys … their brothers, their dad, boys at school, boys doing bike and skateboard ‘tricks’ in front of us as we walked.

We arrived as the first musician was performing … he was great! He sang mostly 80’s music … I loved it … the girls rolled their eyes.

The second opening act was Janelle Monae … you might have heard her song Tightrope on the Chevrolet Cruze advertisements. During her entire performance I felt as though I was at a Mardi Gras party in New Orleans! She is an amazing performer!

Then, Mr. BM (my daughters just DID NOT find my calling him a BM … bowel movement … funny at all) hit the stage! WOW! He was great! He wooed the crowd of many … not sold out, but many loud, fun-loving people. The age range of attendees was, from my vantage point, from about three years old to over seventy.

Bruno had a great stage performance, with fantastic and energetic musicians along with him.

The girls and I danced and sang along with Bruno … we clapped, we swayed they swooned (because he was, of course, singing only to them). We had a super evening of girl-time.

Mr. Mars (and, of course, we are Ms. Venus) had a great concert (which started at 7:30, and didn’t end until 11pm). That doesn’t mean I give him a thumbs up when it comes to all that he produces … but I also don’t choose to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Although his ‘Grenade’ song seems self sacrificial, it also seems he needs to get a grip on the reality that ‘his’ girl just isn’t his! And, although it might be quite tame (and nothing like some songs lyrics of terrible violations of others), ‘Our First Time’, is not the message I want my girls to fall for, in real life.

What these questionable messages do provide is ample opportunity to discuss how we each hear those lyrics, what we each believe about the messages, and the good, bad and the ugly of what many in our society believe to be ‘normal’, ‘common’ and ‘real.’ Those conversations can be worth the cost of admission!

So, today as I don’t feel like doing anything (I just want to lay in my bed) … I am just thankful that my two daughters, even at fourteen and eighteen, are willing to go have an evening with their out-of-date momma. It was more like a gift TO me.
“When I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl(s) you’re amazing
Just the way you are”

Mr. BM

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