Months ago I began writing a blog post. The title, above, was all I wrote. Though I do not remember what exactly I planned to write, I know that I planned to reflect on our anniversary, as we reached the milestone of 32 years married.
And here we are, 32 years under our belts and a title for a blog post.
So, what is a promise?
- a declaration or assurance that one will do a particular thing or that a particular thing will happen (Oxford Dictionary)
- a declaration that one will do or refrain from doing something specified (Merriam Webster Dictionary)
But, these are nouns, things like a piece of paper, a marriage certificate, a legally binding document.
A marriage is more than paper and ink, more than a one-time declaration.
Marriage is a living entity. A moving, breathing organism. So, to define a promise we also need to look at it’s verb definitions:
- to tell someone that you will certainly do something (Cambridge Dictionary)
- to undertake to do something in the future (Free Dictionary)
- to give ground for expectation (Merriam Webster Dictionary)
It is here, in the verb definitions, that our understanding of what a promise is takes form and brings understanding … understanding not just in words, but with feet to put it into practise.
Let’s be quite honest here, promises are not easy.
To make this marriage promise-making even more difficult, they are promises made in ignorance … trust. For neither knows what events, challenges and decisions are to come, that will poke and prod us as individuals and as a couple, that will change us, that will change the face, behaviors and mind of the one to whom we make these promises.
- to have and to hold from
- for better for worse
- for richer for poorer
- in sickness and in health
- to love
- cherish
Hubby is not the man I made those promises to …
and I am not the woman who he made those promises to either.
We have changed. Changed in how we live and think. Changed in how we spend our time. Changed in how we spend our money. Changed our location of living. Changed in our perspectives about issues that are important. Changed in how we see the world. Changed in how we see each other.
yet …
(and I can only speak for me)
I made a promise to you …
till death us do part …
And a promise should not be kept with gritted teeth, but with intent to make good what was said.
For the promise I made did not come with a caveat … no conditions or limitations.
It was not a promise to our marriage if … but even if.
Marriage is the covenant that God chooses to show, to reflect his holiness.
This promise-making is what can bring us closer to understanding the love of God (the groom) for His bride (the church). His promise is eternal, unconditional, unwavering and has far more to do with the promise maker (God) than the one to whom the promise is made (the bride).
It is not promise making for the sake of our happiness, but to bring us closer to THE promise-maker!
We must continue to hold firmly to our declarations of love, of faith. The one who made the promise is faithful.
itsawonderfilledlife 