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Posts Tagged ‘mother heart’

Three Reasons to Stay Married

Posted in Marriage, WONDER, tagged 1 Peter 5:10, child of God, chris august, dreamy, Love, Marriage, mother heart, old and gray, restore, romantic side, stay together, three reasons to stay married, Valentine's Day on February 14, 2013| Leave a Comment »

Happy Valentines Day! images-2

The day of love, love, love …

Let’s face it, for many it not a day of love, but of regrets, loneliness, and broken marriages.

I’m gonna be really honest in saying that I have had those Valentine’s Days too (who hasn’t?), and hubby has probably had even more than me!

We have treated each other poorly. We have disrespected, mistrusted, lied, not forgiven, yelled at, ignored, punished and mistreated each other … over and over, and over again. So, why do we stay together? Good question!

I cannot speak for hubby (and really, he is safer if he just lets me speak for him), but I think that there are three reasons.

The first is from my romantic, dreamy side …

We have talked, ever since we were dating and just started talking about marriage, about our vision of both being old and gray (well, hubby, not me) and sitting in rocking chairs on a porch, hand in hand, watching the sunset together. I am not sure exactly why but that vision has stuck for me. When things are good in our relationship, or when things really suck royally, that vision comes to my mind … and reminds me of the end goal.

The second is from my mother heart …

I remember hearing an interview with Kathie Gifford years ago, when there was great publicity over a sexual indiscretion committed by her husband, and she quoted what her counselor had said to her, after a ‘poor me’ monologue, “he looked at me, and said, Kathie — and now this is two years after — “If you can’t forgive your husband, forgive your children’s father.”” Although I do not believe that that rational applies to all circumstances, it is a line that has haunted me, when things are going good in our relationship, or when things really suck royally, and a vision of our three kids comes to my mind … and reminds me of the goal of modeling commitment for our kids that will encourage them if they too marry.

The third is from the part of me that recognizes I am a child of God …

Marriage is hard work. I cannot imagine the marriage of two people without desiring at least once to call it quits. That said, twenty-three years in the wedded trenches have convinced me that seeing how God can restore us after a season of wanting to throw in the towel, makes our marriage even better. I would not ever choose to go through those rough times, but going through them, and coming out the other side is a most miraculous picture of what God can do with two extremely flawed, extremely selfish individuals. I am convinced that 1 Peter 5:10 is all about marriage:

“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ,
after you have suffered a little while,
will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”

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The Way to a Mother’s Heart

Posted in GOD, life, Love, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged Children, Food, Gift, Kids, loss, Love, man's heart, Mom, mother heart, Prayer on May 31, 2012| 4 Comments »

It is said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. The way to a mother’s heart is quite a different route.

There are so many things that one can do to win the favor of one who is a mother. You can make a meal for her family. You can tell her she looks great (even with bags under her eyes from a sleepless babe, or talkative teen keeping her up at night). You can compliment her home, her work, her husband.

There is only one way to win the heart of a mother … say or do something nice, kind, or generous, for her child.

Just the other day, I got a text from hubby, telling me that a man in our church was gone. He was ninety-one years old, had a beautiful wife (just days from their sixty-sixth anniversary), supportive children, and his body had simply given in to the effects of aging. This man was dearly loved, by all who knew him. He was an amazing support to my hubby, teaching, mentoring and supporting him in a gentle, fatherly way. I always received words of encouragement, and love from him.

The thing I appreciated most about this man was that he told us, many times, that he prayed for our kids. In this act of love, he won the heart of this mother.

In hearing of his death, I felt the loss of the dear man who really knew how to love.

I also feel the weight of the loss of his prayers for my kids.

To know that someone is praying for your kids, is to know of a magical-like experience. There is a sense of other-worldly connection with that person. There is a sense of receiving love that is out of this world amazing.

To hear someone say, “I pray for your children” is to have won the lottery. Not because there is anything ‘magical’ about praying (God is not a sugar daddy who delivers all that we want), but because it is the act of love that cannot be adequately thanked for. It is not an act of love that gets acclaim.

It is an act of love that comes from knowing that growing up is not always easy, being a pastor’s kid is not always easy. The time that goes in to spending it with the God of the universe to lift them up to Him in humble prayer is the best gift there is.

In telling us of his sacrificial act, we were encouraged, as parents. This man knew of the intimacy of prayer, the strength that comes from prayer, and the reliance on God for every thing in life. He knew it, because he lived it.

He knew the way to this mother heart, and our family feels the loss of his love.

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