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Posts Tagged ‘#walkamileinmyshoes’

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As I walk through the high school I work in I pass dozens (hundreds) of faces each day. When I am cognizant, when I am not so wrapped up in my own thoughts, I see the faces more clearly.

I see the big smiles, the laughter, I see the eyes that resist making contact, the faces that are hidden by their downward stare, the eyes that look right through me …

and I wonder, what is their story? what are they dealing with?

During these times when I am alert to those who pass by in the hallways, I am reminded of how significant the insignificant can be, for those who might have a story that is hard, heavy.

To step aside, so they can pass, to hold a door, to smile, to say good morning, to pick up the pencil that fell from their laden arms …

these are the wordless ways we can whisper to another,

you matter

someone cares

someone notices

someone has empathy for you

In Romans 12:15, Paul reminds of a profound teaching, that we are all expected to practise:

“Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep” 

We are to not just co-exist with one another, but we are to share life together. We are not just to share life together, but we are to experience, to feel the joys and struggles of each other.

empathy

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Women and footwear … they go together like peanut butter and jam! Of course some of us have far more footwear than others. I wonder if skinny women have less footwear? I mean, when I am shopping, but having a ‘fat’ day, I buy shoes … they always fit! But, I digress …

Our footwear tells us so much about ourselves … not the pretty top part of our shoes, but the soles. The pretty part, on top (and I have to say that even my Nike running shoes … that never get to run … are quite beautiful to my eyes, because of the miles of walking and meditating that they represent) is all about the looks, the appearance, the ‘outer’ part. But it is the soles that reveal where we have been, the miles of effort, the wear and tear of life.

There are guy shoes, and girl shoes.

I don’t know about you, but one thing that is not appealing to me is wearing the footwear of someone else. This is ‘not right’ to me, next to using the toothbrush of someone else. And so, for me, to walked a mile in the moccasins of another person is not an easy, or natural action.

But folks, it’s time to do some shoe exchanging, in the quest for what women want!

Three years ago the latest Royal Wedding occurred, full of pomp and splendor. It was a highly anticipated event, with the world watching, as a young couple declared their vows … to love, comfort, honor and keep in sickness and in health.

Man, did I not know what I was vowing, many years ago, when I promised those same things. When my hubby is bent over the porcelain god, and the entire house reverberates with his moans, screeches and other … noises, putting myself in his shoes is not my first response! My first response is to shut the door to the bathroom (after throwing a towel at him … from afar), and hide my head under my pillow, to muffle his ghastly noises. But, I digress … again.

One of the best ‘mistakes’ my husband ever did, when our kids were younger, was to ask me what I wanted for my birthday (for a man to ask this, is similar to a man asking for directions, asking for help …). I told him … ‘an entire day to myself’, and that is what I got. I awoke before anyone else (that was very early, because the kids were very young), dressed, and left … and didn’t return again until I was certain that the kids were asleep that night. It was a beautiful thing! I shopped, I had coffee, I walked, I read … I did only what I wanted to do.

The ‘mistake’ of it was that I loved it so much, I did it again at Mother’s Day, and then started doing it once a season. But, it wasn’t just me going that was beneficial, it was hubby staying. While I was off having fun, he was home, walking in my moccasins. He changed diapers, wiped noses, refereed fights, read stories, made meals (NOT! But he did take them out to McDonalds, or for pizza) … he walked where few MEN have walked before … in his wife’s shoes!

What do women want? We want to know, that our husband, our significant ‘other’, can understand what demands are on her day. We want to know that he is really ‘getting it’ when we are frustrated, or sad, or happy, or crying (because we are frustrated, sad, or happy … or all three). We want to know that he ‘gets it’ in regards to what we do, everyday, for others. Not because it is in our job (that we get paid for) description, but because it is in our nature to nurture and give to others … and, sometimes that leaves us on empty, with no refill in sight.

“Walk a mile in my shoes
just walk a mile in my shoes
Before you abuse, criticize and accuse
Then walk a mile in my shoes”

Elvis Presley “Walk a Mile in My Shoes”

What Women Want Part 5 of 5

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