Archive for June 24th, 2015

In the deli of life, I am the deli meat.

My parents, they share the middle with me … they are the fixings.

My children, they are one end … one slice of bread.

My grandparents, they are on the other end … the other slice of bread.

As I look at the lifetime of my grandparents, I see a life that was marked by waiting … for everything! If they wanted strawberries, they had to wait for summer. If they wanted to hear a certain song on the radio, they had to wait for it to play (if they even had a radio). If they wanted to purchase something, they had to wait until they had earned the money needed to pay for it. If they wanted to connect with their family members in the ‘old country’ they had to write a letter, mail it, and then wait for their response. If they wanted cut flowers in a vase, they had to wait for them to bloom, and if it was winter, there were no cut flowers.

Waiting was the norm in the lives of my grandparents.

As I look at the lives of my kids, and those of their generation, I see everything and anything as instant.

If they want strawberries, they can drive to a store, pay with a credit or debit card (even if there is no credit available, as there is always overdraft), and be chowing down on their hearts desire in about ten minutes. If my kids want to connect with their cousins on the other end of the country, they send a text, an email. If they want to hear a certain song, they search for it on the web and listen to it.

Waiting has not been the norm in the lives of my kids.

My kids are not alone, and they have missed out on an important understanding, that waiting, or to wait, is a verb … it is an action word. Waiting is not a time of nothing, but a time of preparation, of anticipation.

As a mom of young adults, and one who works in a high school, I have noticed a switch in thinking from the generations before. Those who have been brought up in this society of instant fulfillment, instant gratification, have a gap in their learning, for they have missed the value of waiting.

Disclaimer …
If you are reading this and you think I am simply pointing my finger at a younger generation in that stereotype way that older generations have been known to do, please know that my finger is pointing back at myself (and my generation). We have grown up in the middle of wait and no wait. We have become the generation who needs Weight Watchers, debt consultants, and divorce lawyers … we/I have problems too!

An area that seems to be, frequently, not waited for is intimacy.

This is not unexpected in those who do not profess a faith and life in Christ, but there is a very real shift, among Christians, to just do it.

The good thing is that (unlike my generation, who tried to hide it) this generation is doing it, and are not hiding their actions.

The bad thing is that there is much that is missed by not experiencing the action of waiting.

And this is so NOT just for girls! For guys are missing out too.

Sexual intimacy and relational (that’s the heart type) intimacy involve more than just the body, mind and heart. These forms of intimacy also involve the souls, and are best experienced in a covenantal relationship. A covenantal relationship is one where there is mutual agreement, mutual responsibility. In regards to the covenantal marriage relationship, it is intended to be safe, mutually beneficial, healthy and ended only at death.

Though I am not sure how to turn the tide of Christian singles choosing to not participate in the action of waiting, I do believe we need to somehow convince this generation that vintage is best when it comes to our bodies and souls.



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