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Archive for January, 2013

It is said, by them, that opposites attract.00769-funny-cartoons-porcupine

They say that the characteristics that drive us buggy each and every day (not in my relationship, of course) about each other are the same characteristics that drew us to our nemesis love in the first place.

For instance, the hubby who is frustrated with his wife’s inability to just get at a task and get it done, also loved how she would drop whatever she was doing to spend time with him when they first met. The woman who would like to wring her hubby’s neck for talking to every person in the grocery store, once respected how friendly he was to people.

So, we are advised by them to focus on the good side of those characteristics, rather than on the side that causes the emotional equivalent of an anaphylactic shock (not always an easy task without epinephrine!).

Truly living together can leave a person prickly!

I drive my hubby nuts because I put off each and every telephone-related task that I need to make. He drives me nuts because a telephone is a permanent part of his appearance.

I have probably caused hubby to lose years off his life (and definitely sleep) by bringing the dreaded beasty into our home and life. He has probably caused me to lose years of my life driving with him.

And speaking of driving, those solar signs that tell you what speed you are going make me slow down to dangerously low speeds because I am always so panicked by their presence. Hubby, on the other hand sees them and speeds up to see just how high he can get the number to go! But, I digress …

The yin and yang of the pairing within a marriage relationship can seem ridiculously unnatural. Sort of like the fantastic combination of balsamic vinegar and olive oil for a salad … they do not even stay mixed together! Or dollops of cold sour cream onto hot and spicy tacos. Or the brightness of the stars on the darkest night. Or putting animal dung on the same soil where we plant crops (and if you think I am going to identify which in the marital relationship is the plant and which is the dung …).

Or the combination of a man and woman, biologically, emotionally, socially opposites. Yet if God himself is the one responsible for the matching of male and female, I guess He must know what He was doing in making us not just opposite, but attractive to each other as well.

“The Lord God said,
“It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Genesis 2:18

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According to http://www.thefreedictionary.com, the doldrums are, “a belt of calms and light winds between the northern and southern trade winds of the Atlantic and Pacific.” Years ago, when wind power was utilized for blowing the sails of the ships of the day, ending up in the doldrums could result in sailors being stranded for days, or even weeks, without enough wind to move their sails … possibly resulting in death.

Samuel Coleridge, in his famous poem, The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, described this nautical region:

The fair breeze blew, the white foam flew,
The furrow followed free;
We were the first that ever burst
Into that silent sea.

Down dropped the breeze, the sails dropped down,
‘Twas sad as sad could be;
And we did speak only to break
The silence of the sea!

All in a hot and copper sky,
The bloody sun, at noon,
Right up above the mast did stand,
No bigger than the moon.

Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.”

The doldrums do not necessarily only have to do with a location in the ocean.

For many of us the doldrums might be related to the C. S. Lewis phrase, “always winter, but not never Christmas.”

In full force and with no doubt … the winter doldrums land. Oh, it is not immediate, it starts slowly with an increasing difficulty to get out of bed in the mornings. There is the appeal of bedtime, anytime after dinner. There is the recoiling whenever some new responsibility or activity or meeting is added to the calendar. There is a lack of excitement about just about anything.

Like the doldrums out in the waters, the winter doldrums back on land can be quite a time of thirsting for refreshment that is so needed, the sun. Our days are shorter, and for those of us living in the monsoon belt, the skies are so much darker. Our bodies are lacking from the natural infusion of Vitamin D from our solar buddy. In our weakened physical states we are more susceptible to the viruses and colds of the flu season. We are also more susceptible to feeling unmotivated, down in the dumps, sad.

It is believed that approximately 1 in 4 people suffer with some sort of Seasonal Affective Disorder/depression due to the doldrums of winter. It can start as early as October and last until into April. For many being intentional about taking vitamins, eating healthy and getting outdoor physical activity can make the season more bearable. For others a ‘sun lamp’ saves the day. For others still, medication might be needed.

For myself it was moving to the Pacific Northwest that introduced me to the winter doldrums. Each year is different, and is accompanied by one common thread … a heaviness of heart that descends upon me like the weight of one of those x-ray blankets that the dental office uses when filming ones mouth.

The doldrums are a period of moaning, groaning … of lamenting. Lamenting like the prophet of Jeremiah in his recording of his lamentations in the Bible. Even though he recorded miseries, weeping, desolation and destruction, right in the midst of the doldrums is his reason for hope:

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.”
Lamentations 3:22-23

Just before it, Jeremiah speaks of how his “soul is downcast within him” and just after he speaks of being alone, with his face buried in the dust.

May we all, while in the doldrums, or lamenting, be able to say, great is your faithfulness!

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A good day for me might involve a wonderful conversation with a friend, or a time of deep belly laughter with my children, or morning coffee on a day off with hubby, or a walk on the trail with the beast.

images-2A bad day can take many forms, but would often include rain … especially anytime from November to March, when the monsoon season is upon those of us in the Pacific Northwest.

Just as rain falls on us all, so suffering comes to us all.

Matthew 5:45 tells us, “He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” Now I do not mind the idea of sharing the sun with the evil, but do I really have to share in the rain? Shouldn’t life be, well, easy for those of us who are good, and righteous, and more difficult for those who are evil and unrighteous? Isn’t that only right, only fair?

I sometimes think that my biggest problem in living this life is that I am looking for fairness, for goodness, for ‘payback’ here in this life. I think that I am looking for the rewards of following Christ to be handed out here and now.

I read verses like those of Deuteronomy 11:25-26, “see, I am setting before you today a blessing and a curse— the blessing if you obey the commands of the Lord your God that I am giving you today; the curse if you disobey the commands of the Lord your God and turn from the way that I command you today by following other gods,which you have not known,” and I figure that the blessing is for me for today, for now.

And maybe it is for now. Maybe I am being blessed on a daily basis (and indeed I am) but I am not even acknowledging the blessings that are mine. Each day I can enjoy the greatest blessing, that of walking each and every step, not alone or on my own strength, but with my God, and the power to live my life being energized by His strength in my weakness.

But maybe, just maybe, the blessings are for another time, another place. Maybe here on our God-created, but sin-soiled planet we cannot even receive the perfect blessing that God has for us.

Maybe the rains of suffering, given to all … good and evil, righteous and unrighteous, are to remind us that we are not good, or evil, but we are what God’s grace has transformed us into … blessed creatures, living under the grace of our perfect God.

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To be redeemed is to be saved, to be freed, to have the chains of your life cut free from your wrists, your ankles, often at a price you could not pay, so another steps in and pays your debt.

There are many ways, many circumstances, from which we can be redeemed.

Old bananas that are getting not just brown spots, but soft spots as well, can be taken and made into delicious banana bread. The paper products that we use can be recycled and made into new paper products rather than become landfill. But I am not thinking of the redemption of ‘things’ I am thinking of the redemption of people, of lives, of souls.

The person singing too loudly for their musical abilities, can be surrounded by others with much more talent, who join in the chorus, and make the bad of one sound good when surrounded by many (thank you to those who, with musical ability, surround my poor singing each Sunday). The person who has been in prison, convicted of a terrible crime, can be found innocent, and set free from his or her prison chains. The person whose sins have been erased by a holy and loving God …

Humanly speaking redemption, God’s redemption of mankind, is impossible to understand.

It makes no sense that I am saved, freed, through the innocent, perfect blood of the son of the God of this world. It makes no sense that He would choose me over holy, and that through the sacrifice of the holy One, I am made holy (“for God’s will was for us to be made holy by the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ, once for all time” Hebrews 10:10).

Isaiah 44:22 says, “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you.”

They are swept away … like the dust on the floor, like the sand as the tide goes back out … never, ever to be exactly the same. Cleansed, re-created, and re-birthed into a new creation. All that was, is no more.

What good reason to celebrate! To be thankful.

“I know that my redeemer lives,
and that in the end he will stand on the earth.
And after my skin has been destroyed,
yet in my flesh I will see God;
I myself will see him
with my own eyes—I, and not another.
How my heart yearns within me!
Job 19:25-27

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Kids today deserve more credit than we give them.24418022950876082_SHVOlNqK_b

We complain that they are lazy, selfish, and directionless. We feel intimidated when we see a group of teens. We look at their appearance, their fashion, their music and critique that they have no taste. We say they do not know how to speak to adults, that they give one word responses, that they do not make eye contact. We complain about them … their attitudes, their behaviors. We look down on them.

Is that the whole story? Is the future in peril because of our teens? Are they really any different than the teens that we were not all that long ago?

Back when I was a kid, a teen, I remember vividly the experience of returning a watch that my grandmother had given me as a high school graduation present because it was not working. Receipt in hand, I took it back to the store where my grandmother had purchased it. I presented myself, and my story, to the lady working at the store. She looked at me suspiciously, spoke very rudely to me, and made it clear to me that she did not believe my story. I was finally able to get my watch exchanged, but I left the store with a feeling of inferiority and of not being believed … heard.

Do we ‘hear’ kids and teens today? Do we look down on them simply because they are young?

In 1 Timothy 4:12, the young are told,

“don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young,
but set an example for the believers in speech,
in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.”

But how do the young learn how to set a good example “in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity” if it is not modeled to and for them by those of us who have raised them?

We give much to our children, but it is at a cost. Most parents provide many tools and toys for their children, working long hours to pay all that is needed. I read a report last week that said that 38% of children in grade 5 have a cell phone. The number jumps to over 83% just three grades later.

We provide many extracurricular activities for our children, yet from my own parental experience that too can be disappointing. I have observed parents who seem to expect their children to perform as Olympic athletes, yelling and demeaning them, or their coaches, in competitions. Or, parents do not even attend the performances of their children.

As adults we cannot expect mature behavior, passion-filled lives, or desire to help others if we do not love, mentor, lead and (most importantly) spend time with children and teens (ours, or others whose lives cross with our own).

They and the raw material that they are when they are born, are created in the image of their Creator. They and how they grow to develop and mature is in the image of us, the parents who created them.
children-turn-out-well-quote

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”

James Baldwin

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colonoscopy-jokes-tax-increases-political-poster-1283526582A couple of months ago I received an email forward of a humorous depiction of a man’s experience having had a colonoscopy. I laughed so hard that I thought my insides would burst from the intensity of my giggling.

A colonoscopy is a medical procedure that most of us should will experience. It is our best indicator of numerous things, but especially of colon cancer (also called colorectal cancer or bowel cancer).

According to the Canadian Cancer Society:

  • colon cancer is the third most common cancer
  • in 2012, an estimated 23,300 Canadians will have been diagnosed with colorectal cancer and 9,200 will die of it
  • it is the second leading cause of death from cancer in men and women combined
  • apx. 10,300 women will be diagnosed with colorectal cancer and 4,200 will die of it.
  • apx. 13,000 men will be diagnosed with colorectal cancer and 5,000 will die of it.
  • one in 13 men is expected to develop colorectal cancer during his lifetime and one in 28 will die of it.
  • one in 16 women is expected to develop colorectal cancer during her lifetime and one in 32 will die of it.

All of the above mentioned facts make the reason for the procedure no laughing matter. At the same time, avoiding this procedure, simply out of fear is also not funny, or wise.

In this guest post, Dave Berry weaves a humorous tale in his article, A Journey into my Colon.

I encourage you to click on the link, read, laugh, then consider how much less frightening this procedure can be when we consider how treatable this cancer is, when diagnosed early (plus he has a down-loadable certificate 😉 ).

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Today I am featuring a guest post, who is not a guest.

The guest today is not the author, because the author is myself. Instead the guest is the main character in a fictional story that I have written.

About a year ago I began writing a fictional story that I thought would be a weekly feature for a few short weeks … really just a short story. What happened instead was the beginning of a relationship with this fictional woman, named Amara, for my readers, and for myself.

The story of Amara, her past and present, grew and has gone from a short story to the fictional novel that I am writing still.

Back around the New Year I mentioned in my post, Goals for 2013 – Things to Accomplish, that one of my goals was to complete the book that I had started writing. Since then I have had so many people ask me about the book, that I decided to feature it here, so that you could take a look. You will find a link from each segment to the next. There are twenty segments available in this story, so make that warm drink, put your feet up, and get to know Amara, Joy and their family.

Unfading

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English poet, Alexander Pope said, “to err is human; to forgive, divine,” expressing well that forgiveness takes a Christ-likeness to offer, but I wish he had said something about forgetting as well.

I was reminded of this when I encountered a reminder of my past mistakes, failures, sins. I felt certain that I had acknowledged what I had been doing wrong, had asked for forgiveness and had been striving in my daily life to not return to the wrongdoings of my past. Then it was back, staring me in the face like nothing had ever changed. I was blown away, frustrated and disappointed.

When God heals us of our sin, it is a complete and miraculous event. He can take our failures and foibles and redeems them, and us, so fully that we are encapsulated by His forgiveness, and the altering that only He can do in our human hearts and lives. Even to the extent that we completely forget our actions.images-4

But we humans are not divine, and we cannot forget completely.

I was so sure, so confident that God had healed me from those sins. That they were forgiven, erased and forgotten for all time … and that was and is true. What I had missed was that, although I felt transformed, cleansed and redeemed, there still are Earthly consequences to sin, and one of the most pervasive consequences is that others do not forget.

What frustration to have worked so hard at allowing God to change ourselves for the better, only to have someone throw our past mistakes back into our faces. It would feel like our efforts are hopeless.

But our efforts at allowing God to change our lives, our hearts, are never hopeless or meaningless. Every good and broken part of our lives are part of His plan for our life.

Just like the injuries of childhood heal completely, and the pain of them be completely forgotten they still leave scars that stay with us all of our life, and sin leaves lifelong scars too. But like a physical scar from our childhood, that can remind us of the pain of touching a hot stove, the reminders of of our past sins can remind us to continue pursuing right living, and of how very humanly frail we really are.

“For I will forgivetheir wickedness
    and will remember their sins no more.”
Jeremiah 31:34

 

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images-2I am awed by the manner and intricate detail with which my God makes efforts to encourage me, teach me, comfort me and communicate with me.

There have been times when I have opened my Bible, or another book of words written hundreds of years ago, and it is as though the message were hand picked for me, for that exact moment in time. There are innumerable instances when I have cried out to Jesus for help, only to turn on the music to hear a very perfect response.

In these unexpected times of oneness with my heavenly father, I am left with one main knowledge … He loves me … He, the Creator of all life, and the perfecter of all beauty, mystery and wonder truly loves me, and will never leave me alone.

This communication and communion of intimacy happened again just days ago. I was not particularly needy or downcast, but I was lowering my head and asking for His encouragement. As I opened up to my social media there on the screen was the message that as soon as I started to read I knew it was for me, for my eyes, my heart, my soul.

The status was written by a Laura Lynn Tyler Thompson, an author, speaker and television host (700 Club Canada) whose status updates are always filled with encouragement, but it is never drivel that seems forced and fake. She wrote:

“No matter what you are facing, there is a powerful place of profound relationship that is offered to those who would steadfastly seek the Father.

Psalm 25:14 “The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning.”

God’s covenant to you is that He will NEVER leave you or forsake you. Though man, jobs, locations and circumstances may all change and bring discontent and concern, your God is faithful to the very end. You have no need to worry that any dread, anxiety or fear would take hold of your situation. Talk to the bad thoughts and tell them to take a number and get in the line-up to ‘not listening’. Give no place to negative and disturbing contemplations of our natural mind. They bear no validity to truth. Having done all stand in Christ alone. Your victory is being devised by far greater forces than what has come against you.”

Then, just hours after reading and pondering her words, the words of a song came on the radio, and although I do not believe they were written with this intent, I heard them as though spoken to my heart from my Savior:

“Settle down, it’ll all be clear
Don’t pay no mind to the demons
They fill you with fear
The trouble it might drag you down
If you get lost, you can always be found
Just know you’re not alone

Cause I’m going to make this place your home”

He loves me … He, the Creator of all life, and the perfecter of all beauty, mystery and wonder truly loves me, and will never leave me alone.

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imagesChristmas has been cleaned away from our house.

The tree is down and out on the deck, the lights are packed away, my collection of nativities are snug in their boxes, and I am thrilled with the cleanliness and order of my living room.

I have been accused of being too excited to un-decorate from the Christmas season. Perhaps it is because I start hinting at doing so just after opening all of the presents on Christmas morning? I do admit to loving the process, but not because I am putting away Christmas.

I think I have discovered that what I love about putting away the Christmas decorations is that I have all the time in the world to do it. I can look at each decoration with precious memories of who gave it to us, when and why. The tree in our home is not an interior decorator’s masterpiece, it is a conglomeration of ornaments of sentimentality, tossed on the branches by our trio of children who look at each and reminisce as they hang them precariously on the tips of the branches.

When we decorate for the season, it is a far more rushed affair! This year even more than others, as we struggled for so long to find the time to all go to get a tree from the tree farm. Finally, thanks to a ‘snow day’ on December 19th, we got the tree. Then, on December 22nd, I donned my grumpy pants, and told the men in our house that they had better get that tree in the stand and in the living room before I got home. Then, on December 23rd, I re-wore my grumpy pants and told everyone that they had better be home and unpacking the tree decorations that afternoon … or else! So, by December 25th, I was just thankful that it had gotten done.

And now it is all over. The hustle and the bustle, the wrappings and the unwrappings, the cooking and the eating (and the eating, and the eating).

As I admired each decoration, with memories and stories and love attached. As I placed each representative of the first Christmas story back in it’s packaging, the song of the season for me played again in my heart.

Although I was slow and negligent to prepare the outward elements of the Christmas season, my inner preparations and focus were perfectly clear all season long.

It stared in late November when I encountered this song, as though God himself set it to reverberate in my ears, my brain, my heart, just long enough to know that it was my focus of worshiping Him for this season.

As if to confirm my understanding of the earlier gift of this song from my Creator, as we sat to enjoy our Christmas Day feast together … snow was falling …

“Oh, You came like a winter snow
Quiet and soft and slow
Falling from the sky in the night
To the earth below”

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