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Archive for August 11th, 2014

“She stopped playing their song

when she realized

she was dancing alone.”

Boris Pasternak

I discovered this quote one day as I was ‘feeling the pain’ of heartbreak of a woman friend. She was feeling so deceived, so hurt, so exposed, so … alone. And the quote seemed to describe perfectly the experience and emotions that she was feeling. And most of us, who have loved and lost, have felt those same emotions.

We women have such definite dreams of happily ever after. Our society, our being female, has so programmed us to dream of, seek and hold on to the hope of that elusive prince on a white horse. For some, we have found him. For some, once he kissed us at the alter, his amphibian-nature became apparent. For some, ‘he’ is still to be found. For some ‘he’ is never found.

Why do we seek the prince so, and what is it that we hope to find within him, that we need so desperately?

Maybe it is his presence, his aura. That statuesque quality of his body or his being.

Maybe it is his attention, his dotting and lavishing of his resources on us.

Maybe it is the security, the protection of one stronger, one physically larger than us (is it okay to say this, in our day of being independent females?)

Maybe it is the availability of a spider-killer, jar-opener, top shelf-reacher, foot-massager.

Maybe it is the desire to recreate and nurture life with another.

Maybe, just maybe it is the desire to be cared for unconditionally by another, who will love and be devoted to us …

even when we get a bad haircut,

or grow stretch marks,

or lose our girlish loveliness,

or lose our cool,

or our body parts migrate south,

or we tweeze more frequently under our chin than under our eyebrows,

or, or, or …

Does the prince really exist?

I do not know if THE prince does exist.

I do not know if every lady, has a knight waiting for her.

But, I do know the King, and he very much wants to provide the security, the love, the caring, the presence and the attention that we all so desperately desire, want and need.

I wish I could wipe the tears, and mend the tears in the hearts of the heartbroken, but my efforts and my words will never fill the brokenness. Only the king can do that.

And when a woman is able to accept his love and mercy, it is then that she has become the princess … no longer in waiting.

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