itsawonderfilledlife

There I was, just hours away from turning (gulp) thirty-nine with six years experience (OK! I was turning 45!),

and I was not feeling the love.

Hubby and I had just had one of those knock-down, drag-out fights that NO happily married couple would ever admit to having participated in … publicly.

My parents, in fair health, and only in their late sixties, and just seventy had declared that NOPE, they were done traveling, no need to prepare a room for them … I would need to go to them.

So I did what any other hormonal woman (do we women ever grow out of hormonal?) in my shoes would do …

I declared to the trees, and the squirrels, and the birds, and any other creature that was listening (oh, please tell me that no neighbors were listening), that I was unloved, and that there was simply no person on this planet who was willing to sacrifice for me.

Lets face it, what I was doing was holding my very own pity party, and it was not pretty!

Between self pity and sobs I kept hearing in my head :

“Lift your eyes up”

And so, I did, to the sun pouring through the trees in my private cathedral sanctuary.

Then, words came pouring in, like the light through the trees :

“I lift my eyes up … to the mountains”

Hum, no mountains in view, but towering cedars straight ahead.

“Where does my help come from?”

Now, that’s a question that resonated in my self pitying heart and soul!

“My help, it comes from the Lord

the Maker of heaven and earth”

Ah, so this is the benefit of having committed scripture to memory! Once learned it is there forever, ready at a tears notice to flood our minds with encouragement, with truth, with promises.

The pity party did not end immediately, but my need to uncover why that specific verse came to mind, when it did, diverted my attention away from my poor-me attitude.

And that is what this season of Lent is about …

taking our eyes off of our own desires, our own wants, our own sacrifices …

and lifting them to our help

our maker of heaven and earth.

The One who was born, was conceived to sacrifice for us … for all of us.

Our eyes need to keep focus on that which is, on who is

higher, bigger, greater

that ourselves.

My pity party was coming to a close.

My eyes, no longer blinded by tears of self pity, were seeing clearly who my help is … no doubt about it!

Lent is about the One who sacrificed His all, for us all.