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Because I Can

Posted in life, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged because I can, Freedom, last day, making bed, out for dinner, preparing, prepping, School, Summer, summer break, swim on September 3, 2012| Leave a Comment »

As the sun rises (later than back in June … another sign of the impending doom of tomorrow) on this last day before the start of the new school year, GO BACK TO BED! This is IT! The last chance to sleep in for a very long time. Start enjoying the last day, by sleeping in.

I am one of those people who preps and prepares for things rather early. For instance my school supplies were all purchased by the first week of August (I buy most things throughout the year, and stockpile them). Unfortunately, I also mentally prep and plan, and that results in me fretting and fearing for days before an event.

Not this year! Nope! After I have slept in (which sadly means some time after seven but before eight), I will have coffee, on the patio … because I can!

And that will be my motto for the day, because I can.

I man not make my bed, because I can.

I may not get dressed until noon, and it might be from my pj’s to my bathing suit. Maybe I will take a mid day dip, because I can!

I may not cook (okay, my family would say that is nothing new, for this summer, but hey, they say grazing is healthier, right?), but instead have “get it yourself meals” (I personally love this kind of meal).

I may crawl back in my bed in the afternoon and read a book, or write a blog post, or have a nap … because I can!

I may invite hubby to take me out to dinner, because I can.

I may take a walk, because I can.

I may make s’mores on the gas fire-pit, with the family, BEFORE the sun sets, because I can!

I may watch a comedy in the evening that brings me close to peeing my pants, because I can!

I may, I may, I may … because this is the last day of summer vacation, and I can!

Besides, tomorrow morning, when the kids and I drag out butts from our beds and get ready for school/work, my dear hubby will be dancing around the house singing with the guy in the commercial below, because it is his last day of vacation … and he can.

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My List

Posted in FAMILY, life, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged Accomplishment, Disappointments, FAMILY, goals, list, Memories, running out of time, School, Summer, Surprises, to do on August 28, 2012| 2 Comments »

Summer cannot be almost over! My list is not complete!

It has been such a great summer break, and I have been so thankful for each and every day of it. But some of the most important things I wanted from this summer just didn’t happen, and so I think I need to request another couple of weeks. Where do I go to make my request?

Next week it is back to school for our kids (I ‘got’ to return this week), and back to routine, routine, routine.

Here are my top ten unfinished goals of the summer …

10. Have an adventure with our kids
9. Lose 25 pounds by start of school
8. Move stone from side drive (where it has been since early June … sigh)
7. Finish reno. on stairs (a blog post is coming on this one)
6. Finish closet reno. (a blog post is coming on this one too)
5. Replace the roof on my garden shed
4. Walk daily
3. Finish writing and editing book
2. Teach my son to ride a bike (not his goal, but mine)
1. A two to three day trip to a really nice place, with my guy

Sigh …

It was so depressing to get ready for work yesterday, knowing that the above things did not get done. Most I can ignore, but some have been hanging over my head for years, and one or two are simply things that I humanly so wanted to do/accomplish.

But, here we are, getting ready for the end of summer break, and the beginning of a new school year. Purchasing new clothes, new shoes and school supplies that will, in no time at all, be marked on, torn, outgrown and faded … just like this summer.

Oh, but what memories!

10. A day at the PNE (Pacific National Exhibition) with the family
9. A couple of nights with hubby while he did a wedding
8. A pool party with about seventy people from church
7. Lunch with my oldest daughter
6. Shopping with my youngest daughter
5. Sushi dates with my son
4. Projects that got started … oh how they filled my creative side!
3. Cannon Beach … ahhhhhh
2. Watching the sky for shooting stars
1. Making s’mores on the gas firepit night after night, as we talked, giggled and spent time … together

And now, what is to come?

I have learned that it is best to not approach a new school year with any expectations. Instead I simply enter in, and work to be open to whatever it might bring. And, ten months from now, I will end the year with a top ten of surprises, and a new summer list!

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A Girl Can Dream, Right?

Posted in life, The Beast, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged Alone, as you wish, desire, dream, Gift, Home Alone, Princess Bride, Risky Business, solitary, Tom Cruise on August 23, 2012| 2 Comments »

I have this desire that rarely gets fulfilled, but I dream of often. I awaken, later than normal (meaning pretty much any time after seven in the morning), only to the sound of my Beasty scratching under her ears. There is no hubby snoring away beside me, no teenagers needing a drive anywhere, or help to open the pool. I stretch, and sit on the side of my bed to find a note with my name on my bed table. As I reach to enfold it, the following is written:

We have gone out for the day, the whole day.
We will not call, or text or contact you.
Enjoy this gift of a day to enjoy the quiet of our home,
as you wish,
hubby and the kids

And with the reading of the final line, a realization hits me,

I am home alone …

Hallelujah!

(oh, and did you catch the reference to the Princess Bride? “as you wish” … a little romantic reference always makes me happier).

What happens next is a bit of the Tom Cruise dance from the movie Risky Business, and Kevin from Home Alone eating way too much ice cream.

After the initial euphoria is spent on dancing in my underwear (T. M. I … too much information!) and eating ice cream for breakfast I would spread myself across the sofa and smile my biggest Cheshire Cat smile … and smile a contented sigh.

Hey, it is not that I do not love my family, or that I would wish them away. They are four of the best pieces of my life! It is just that once in a while, the thought of being home alone is simply so very delectable to me. The thought of having every waking hour, all to myself, with no expectations of anyone else, just about makes me want to burst with excitement.

And what would I do with all of those hours alone to myself? Well, after the dancing and eating of ice cream … I would probably write a blog post or two (because I love it) … make my bed (because it is my habit) … clean the bathroom (because it needs to be done) … make cookies (because hubby and the kids would love to come home to them) … finish a project or two (because there is always a project or two that is undone in our home) … and weed the garden (because there is just never any desire to do it when others are home).

Hum, other than the dancing and ice cream eating, it really looks like a pretty normal day … but, I desire it so much!

Hey, a girl can dream, right?!

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Learn to Swim

Posted in life, The Hubby, WONDER, tagged child drowned, drowned, drowning, fear of water, floating, how to swim, learn to swim, learning to swim, sink, swim, swim lessons, Swimming on July 20, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Swimming has always been a big part of my life. I remember biking every day of the summer to the local swimming pool, to meet with friends and cool off from the summer heat. The public pool was a place of memories and fun.

It was also, for a short time, a place of total and utter humiliation.

I was about thirteen when my parents signed me up for swimming lessons the first time. Imagine a five foot giant surrounded by half a dozen preschoolers and you will get the full image of my experience.

Thankfully, within a week of lessons, I had progressed to a group where I was not the tallest in the pool (other than the instructor). I had never become an exceptional swimmer, but I loved the water.

When our children were born, swimming was a skill that they learned about the same time that they could walk. I never wanted them to be in water and not be able to stay afloat.

When we bought our current home, complete with a swimming pool, I went out and bought a life jacket for our youngest, who was not yet a swimmer. The nightmares that I experienced over purchasing a house with a pool, kept me sleep-deprived for weeks.

Within a week of being in our pool, our son with swimming like a fish.

My eldest daughter teaches swim lessons, at our pool, as well as at the swimming pools of her clients. She also coaches for a swim club. Swimming has been a huge part of her life.

She often speaks of how young children (toddlers and younger) are eager to enter the water, but it is the non-swimming adults who experience and express fear of water the most.

I was recently speaking with someone who is fearful of the water, and showing them how to float (ah the starfish float, my first swimming lesson). The person (adult) responded, “I have tried, but it is impossible for me to float.”

It is true that this person cannot float, but it is not her physical body that cannot float, it is the fear within her mind, because she has not committed to learning to swim that makes her sink. And there is no reason for this fear to continue, as adult-based swim lessons can be very appropriate and beneficial.

Recently, near our home community, two people died due to non-swimming. One was a young child (under the age of two), who jumped or fell into a swimming pool. The child’s grandmother jumped in to save her grandchild, but, as a non-swimmer, she herself also drowned.

Now a family mourns not one, but two people.

Do yourself, and those around you, who you love, a favor, learn to swim.

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The Brave Husband

Posted in life, The Hubby, WONDER, tagged $5 fund, brave, bravery, closet, confident, D.I.Y., do-it-yourself, Hubby, husbands, nook, renovations, Summer on July 19, 2012| 2 Comments »

What makes a husband brave?

Is it his imposing stature? His choosing to step into a situation that could get ugly to protect his love, or others? His willingness to be the head spider killer of the house?

In my house, and in my marriage, what makes my hubby brave is his willingness to let me ‘experiment’ with our house and garden. And when I say experiment, there are no guarantees that my attempts will turn out as I expect them to.

I love the acronym D.I.Y. (Do It Yourself), and I truly believe that I can. I love home decorating magazines, and buy many (now I buy them at thrift shops), home maintenance books, home renovation TV shows, and Pinterest (oh, how I love Pinterest). I love hardware stores that do not ask me what I am picking up for my husband (and yes, I have had that … three times in one store in one day, by the same guy, who I corrected the first two times … and no, I have not returned there).

Working, extra kids, and extracurricular activities of the kids, have put the kibosh to much of my experimental processes in recent years. I find I do not even have time to ‘dream’ about what I could do, let alone do it! But, this summer was to be different.

I started dreaming the last day before summer break, and have enough ideas to keep me busy until the New Year. The picture at the right was my fist inspiration. I loved how it could provide a place for me ~~to hide~~ to sit and read, or write, or for any of us to tie our shoes.

So, a week and a half into the summer break, I went where no wife should go so without their husband’s agreement … I took our hallway closet totally and completely apart. I’m talking all of the built-in shelves and rod, and the carpet too. By the time poor hubby came home from work, the closet that once housed our coats, shoes, school snacks, water bottles, insulated coffee cups, dog food, boxes of tissues, and poo bags, was as naked as a jay bird (what a weird simile … is a jay bird naked?).

My hubby did not faint, he did not frown, he did not even walk away trying to pretend that what he saw, he didn’t. My hubby said, “I am guessing you have decided on your first project.” To which I smiled, and he smiled, both of us knowing that I was a happy as a pig in … (another simile, but this one I get, because I have seen a pig in mud).

I then shared with him the picture, and reminded him of my five dollar fund that would be paying for this newest of experiments (I always feel self-conscious about the costs of my little experiments, not that hubby has ever made me feel that way, it’s just me). He smiled and said, “looks good.”

Once the project is completed (completed is NOT my specialty, but I am trying to overcome that weak point in my life) I will write a post about it, complete with pictures. So far I am amazed by how wonderfully it is going.

I really do think my hubby is brave. In a world where men still seem to feel the need to control much of life around them, my hubby is confident in who he is … confident enough that he lets me also be who I am, and for that I am immensely thankful.

Note: To see the ‘continuing story’ check out The Closet Reno Part 1

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The Road Trip and The Chartreuse Moose

Posted in The Hubby, WONDER, tagged bored, cafe, desert, disgusting bathrooms, driving, gluten-free, pee break, road trip, The Chartreuse Moose Cafe, undiagnosed ADD, valley, Wedding on July 17, 2012| Leave a Comment »

A road trip was the goal for hubby and I.

Well … not really. The goal was for hubby to officiate the marriage of a wonderful lady, and her knight in shining armor.

This lady has been through quite a life so far. Her marriage being over forty years after her birth, and just over eleven years after her life was almost ended in a tragic accident.

But, enough of THEIR story, let me tell you about the road trip of hubby and I.

First you have to know how very much hubby loves road trips. There are days that we will be driving to a destination near our home when he will say, “it would be so great to just keep going.” He lives with a strong sense of wanderlust when it comes to road trips.

He also has a bit of a need for speed, and that is all I will say on that subject (or my laptop might get taken away 😉 ).

The drive included a ‘pee break’ at one of the very few places to stop (okay, there were a number, but there were few that I would choose to sit my derriere down at). It was … interesting. Okay, wretched might be more the accurate description. It was interesting though, as reading the wall of the bathroom provided for me a biography of someone named Pam, and her yearly loves encapsulated by a heart.

Our driving from the Lower Mainland towards 100 Mile House provided for us sites like the amazing canyon of the Fraser Valley, then desert, then enough conifers to make ‘environmentally responsible’ artificial Christmas trees, seem ridiculous. We did get to see a group of Mountain Goats, but, much to my disappointment there were no bears or moose to see. After a couple of hours of driving with no wildlife to gawk at, my undiagnosed ADD was running rampant.

We stopped at a tourist booth that provided a map of the area, including advertisements of local businesses. This occupied my pea-sized brain for a good … five minutes (I did try to drag my interest out longer, to no avail).

The business that made me giggle, and gave me something to focus on for the remainder of the drive (about one more hour … minus the five minutes I had spent reading those advertisements), was called the Chartreuse Moose Cafe.

I thought it was simply such a funny name for a cafe, that I just had to go there.

Chartreuse is a color where a bit of yellow is added to green, or a bit of green added to yellow. But, Chartreuse is also a French made liqueur, of that same color, so I will stick with the color being the background to the cafe’s name. And a moose, of course is an enormous, wild animal, that you do not want to meet while on foot or while speeding along the highway (unless, of course, you are like me and desire some visual stimulation).

Whatever unexplainable reason for my interest, I could not wait to get there!

We did finally get there, and what a diamond in the rough it was! In a town with more Ski-Doo and boat selling businesses than grocery stores, this place was a real find.

It’s mango smoothie was delightfully refreshing, and it’s menu included a vast assortment of gluten-free eats and treats for those with more tender tummies. They also had amish oatmeal bars that were a meal in themselves, and delicious London Fogs (yes, we returned the next day).

The couple did get married, completed by a roosters crowing, and it was a spectacular day for them, their family and friends (plus they had a very hot pastor officiate 😉 ).

Our drive back home through the canyon was quick and, thankfully, mostly by the light of day. And if we ever get back to 100 Mile House, we will definitely be stopping by the Chartreuse Moose Cafe again.

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Sleeping Single in a Queen Sized Bed

Posted in GOD, The Hubby, WONDER, tagged 1 Corinthians 7:32-35, 1 Corinthians 7:8, choose, husbanc, Isaiah 54:5, married, protector, single, sleeping single in a queen sized bed, sustainer, wife on June 26, 2012| 2 Comments »

With hubby off on his East Coast trip, I have re-learned the beauty of sleeping alone in a queen-sized bed, and hubby is going to be shocked with the changes.

Since he has not been here to insinuate that I snore (what a horrible thing to say! He says it is a horrible thing to hear), and therefore I should not sleep on my back, I have become a back sleeper. I have also gotten quite accustomed to sleeping diagonally across the bed.

Since hubby has been gone I have also learned more important things than the benefits of sleeping solo.

I have heard and read 1 Corinthians 7:8 many times, and it has always made me wonder about how Paul’s words apply to my own life; “to the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am.”

It is intriguing that, in Genesis 2:18, “the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.””

So, which is it? Better to be single, or married?

Well, I think I might have it figured out … (the Christian church accepts no responsibility for the opinions expressed in this grammatically flawed blog, featuring little … NO … formal theological training upon which to trust what I say to be anywhere near Biblically accurate).

When a woman is married, it is easy, natural to look to her husband as the main one to meet all of her needs. It is a natural thing for a wife (or husband) to look to her spouse as the supplier, sustainer, provider and protector. But, in doing this, what the woman has done is replaced the God, who is all of that, with a human being, who was never intended to be more than a helper, a partner to walk through life’s journey. A person to make the walk easier, less lonely, and to experience human oneness of mind, heart body and spirit.

I think that maybe what Paul is saying is that when we chose to marry, although that pairing up might be what God intended (to defeat loneliness). It also means that our spouse can have God-like expectations heaped on him, or her. And these expectations take our eyes, our focus, off the only true Provider, Supplier, Sustainer, and Protector that we were meant to rely on.

Then, in 1 Corinthians 7:32-35, Paul mixes me up even more!

“I want you to live as free of complications as possible.
When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master.
Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life
and in wanting to please your spouse,
leading to so many more demands on your attention.
The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other,
the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God.
I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you,
not make things harder.
All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which
you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.”

So, another challenge of marriage, is that there are more demands on your attention, time and energies, and that means less to spend with God.

It is not that it is a bad thing to spend time “caring for and nurturing each other,” that is something we must do for each other in the marriage relationship, for it to survive. But it does divide our energies and attention more, and in that, our lives become more complicated.

This is why it is so imperative that, when we marry, we do so to one who shares our love for God, so that our marriage can also strengthen and encourage our relationship with our God.

Without hubby here, I have been freed to spend this week with my Maker. Although there are still distractions ALL around me (if Paul had been a mother, he might not have even addressed marriage), I have had more still, quiet moments with my Creator. And it is that which will make me a better wife.

“For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name;
and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer,
the God of the whole earth he is called.”
Isaiah 54:5

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Reasons to be Thankful for my Kids Father

Posted in life, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged blessings, cup half full, FAMILY, Father's Day, Good, Hubby, Reason, Thankful on June 17, 2012| Leave a Comment »

I am so thankful for the father of my kids, and I have so many reasons to be thankful.

On Mother’s Day, I decided to start to create a list of the many things I appreciate my hubby, the father of my children.

He is …

1 – loves God
2 – loves me
3 – loves our three kids
4 – loves his parents
5 – works hard
6 – sacrifices for his family
7 – makes time for school events
8 – makes time for questions
9 – looks after our vehicles
10 – pays our bills
11 – loads the dishwasher
12 – cleans the kitchen after dinner
13 – answers the home phone
14 – is wise
15 – does not act before thinking
16 – sees the best in others
17 – values commitment
18 – values life
19 – hopes for the best
20 – deals with the pool … all of it!
21 – is here
22 – is different from me
23 – encourages
24 – is flexible when I need something
25 – is flexible when our kids need something
26 – says ‘yes’ more than ‘no’
27 – is a helper
28 – desires to improve our family’s life
29 – endures the beast 😉
30 – takes the kids out for a birthday breakfast
31 – he models sensitivity to others
32 – he made it possible for me to be home with our kids when they were young
33 – he understands when I need to get a break from people
34 – he can, and does, open jars for me
35 – he makes the kids school lunches

These are just some of the things that I am thankful for the father of my kids. Looking at the things that I am thankful for, makes life’s cup seem more than half full.

Happy Fathers Day, Hubby.

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The Way to a Mother’s Heart

Posted in GOD, life, Love, The Hubby, The Kids, WONDER, tagged Children, Food, Gift, Kids, loss, Love, man's heart, Mom, mother heart, Prayer on May 31, 2012| 4 Comments »

It is said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. The way to a mother’s heart is quite a different route.

There are so many things that one can do to win the favor of one who is a mother. You can make a meal for her family. You can tell her she looks great (even with bags under her eyes from a sleepless babe, or talkative teen keeping her up at night). You can compliment her home, her work, her husband.

There is only one way to win the heart of a mother … say or do something nice, kind, or generous, for her child.

Just the other day, I got a text from hubby, telling me that a man in our church was gone. He was ninety-one years old, had a beautiful wife (just days from their sixty-sixth anniversary), supportive children, and his body had simply given in to the effects of aging. This man was dearly loved, by all who knew him. He was an amazing support to my hubby, teaching, mentoring and supporting him in a gentle, fatherly way. I always received words of encouragement, and love from him.

The thing I appreciated most about this man was that he told us, many times, that he prayed for our kids. In this act of love, he won the heart of this mother.

In hearing of his death, I felt the loss of the dear man who really knew how to love.

I also feel the weight of the loss of his prayers for my kids.

To know that someone is praying for your kids, is to know of a magical-like experience. There is a sense of other-worldly connection with that person. There is a sense of receiving love that is out of this world amazing.

To hear someone say, “I pray for your children” is to have won the lottery. Not because there is anything ‘magical’ about praying (God is not a sugar daddy who delivers all that we want), but because it is the act of love that cannot be adequately thanked for. It is not an act of love that gets acclaim.

It is an act of love that comes from knowing that growing up is not always easy, being a pastor’s kid is not always easy. The time that goes in to spending it with the God of the universe to lift them up to Him in humble prayer is the best gift there is.

In telling us of his sacrificial act, we were encouraged, as parents. This man knew of the intimacy of prayer, the strength that comes from prayer, and the reliance on God for every thing in life. He knew it, because he lived it.

He knew the way to this mother heart, and our family feels the loss of his love.

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What My Hubby Taught Me

Posted in life, Love, The Hubby, WONDER, tagged 1 Corinthians 13, discernment, Gift, Guilt, Hubby, Innocent, judging, Learning, Love, Mistakes, Teaching on May 16, 2012| 4 Comments »

With a title like this one, I know of at least one person who will read this blog post!

I have been married to my hubby for almost twenty-three years, and yes, he has taught me a thing or two. Probably not as much as he would have liked me to have learned from him in that time 😉 .

The best thing that he taught me has made me a better person, a better mom, a better neighbor, a better colleague and better at my job (probably a better wife too, but hubby would be better at discerning that). It is something that he told me he recently learned from an elderly retired pastor, but really he has been living it as long as I have known him.

This thing that I have learned from hubby is to take people at face value. To not impart guessing into their motives, but to accept them as they are.

It sounds good … it is not easy.

I am one who has a tendency towards discernment. I have an inner ability to grasp and comprehend what is obscure (definition thanks to the Merriam-Webster dictionary). Another way to put it is that I often get a ‘feeling’ or have a sense about individuals when I first meet them, that is often, but not always true. This gift tends to make me very open to some, and very guarded to others.

If I get a bad ‘feeling’ about someone, I tend to treat them with suspicion, distrust, and doubt. It is so easy for me to hang a cloud over that persons head, and for me to treat them in a manner in which they are convicted before they are even accused. I give no opportunity for them to plead their case. I act a judge and jury, and they are imprisoned by arrogant way I yield my ‘gift’.

What hubby has modeled, in my lifetime with him, is that he gives people the benefit of the doubt. He believes well of people, until he has evidence, from them directly of something different. He believes in people with no judgment on them. He gives them the benefit of the doubt. He always believes, always hopes, always perseveres.

Hum, that sounds familiar.

It sounds like 1 Corinthians 13:4-8:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

To love someone is to do all of the above. To pre-judge is to never allow others the opportunity to show their best side, and likewise it never allows us to show ours either.

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